


Just Keep Your Knees Bent

by dartmouth420



Category: RuPaul's Drag Race RPF
Genre: Alcohol, Alternate Universe - Hockey, Angst, Anxiety, Arguments, Break Up, Broken nose, Butch/Femme, Canadian Slang, Developing Relationship, F/F, Fluff, Hockey culture, Hurt/Comfort, Ice-Skating, LGBT Community Events, Marijuana, Original Character(s), Past Abuse, Past Relationship(s), Sad Ending, Sports Injury, Surprising Skills, Swearing, Tooth-Rotting Fluff, Useless Lesbians, concussion, measuring temperature in Celcius, rajila - Freeform, there will be a sequel.. eventually.., they're such goofs
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-02-01
Updated: 2019-08-23
Packaged: 2019-10-20 04:54:27
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 8
Words: 37,475
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17615879
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/dartmouth420/pseuds/dartmouth420
Summary: Raja's dating this cute new girl named Manila. Manila had a fun idea for a date... but it's not what Raja expects.





	1. Minor Ice-Skating Disaster

**Author's Note:**

> Ok this is my first fic! I kind of wanted it to be a Canada AU but it didn't end up working like that but FYI I am Canadian so I wrote it using the kind of language I'd be using regularly in case the dialogue is unusual for anyone (especially when they mention the temperature, it's in Celcius I'm sorry I just don't understand Farenheit at all.) Bonus points if you can guess what important public landmark I based this off of... This might get a sequel or maybe it'll exist as a one-shot? Hope you enjoy it! Feel free to leave comments and ask me anything :)

It was noon on a Friday in late January and Raja's phone was ringing. She glanced at the screen and saw the goofy photo indicating that Manila was calling. That wasn't unusual, they had a tentative plan for the next day and Raja had noticed that Manila liked to clarify their plans in advance. They'd been going out for a couple weeks, so things were pretty fresh but they seemed to be going well. She smiled and picked up the phone, "Hey!"

"Hey Raja!" Manila greeted her.

"What's up?"

"Ohhh nothing…" Manila said, "I was just wondering if you had any plans for tomorrow afternoon?"

"Well, I was hoping to spend it with you, so…" Raja drew out the word.

"So…" Manila giggled, "I was thinking we could go on a date?"

"Yeah, that sounds good," replied Raja, "What do you feel like doing?" She already had some ideas...

"Okay so I had this idea but it's a bit silly, I was thinking-" Manila continued. 

But Raja had started to daydream, imagining a chill afternoon spent at an art gallery or a museum, and then taking Manila home to cuddle, kiss and do… sexy things. And then someone down the hall from the office had hollered at her, asking a stupid question, which Raja had waved away and then-

"-so does that sound alright?"

Raja was caught off guard, and said, "Uh, yeah. Sure!"

"Okay cool, um I'm glad you want to go, wasn't sure if you'd be down for this sort of thing!" Manila babbled nervously, "You know The Commons Park by Cogswell Street? It's a little out of the way but it's not a big deal on transit, or we could drive?"

Raja hadn't been following, and wasn't exactly sure what she had just agreed to.

"Yeah! It sounds like fun and uh, we should drive, it's too cold to be standing around waiting for the bus." Raja ran a hand through her long hair, nervous to admit that she'd hadn't been listening. But she didn't ask what exactly their date activity was supposed to be, something in a park? Visions of hot chocolate and holding hands sprung into her brain. It couldn't be too bad, she thought, and added more confidently, "I'll pick you up at 1:00?"

"Yes! Yay, I'm really excited to see you, I have to work late tonight, but I shouldn't have anything to take home over the weekend so I can actually relax." Manila replied, a smile in her voice. 

"Great! I'll see you tomorrow!"

"Bye!"

"Bye." Raja hung up and stretched, moving her head side to side to get rid of some of the kinks in her neck. She had met Manila a few weeks ago and they seemed to be hitting it off. Raja was looking forward to seeing Manila tomorrow. They had gone out last weekend and Raja had brought Manila to one of her favourite clubs to dance and show off. For someone who worked in the fashion industry (Manila was a fashion illustrator) Manila had seemed oddly uncomfortable with the club environment at the beginning of their date. It had taken a few drinks and a lot of performing by Raja to get Manila out on the dance floor. Raja supposed it could have been the age difference. Raja was about 8 years older than her. But after a little while Manila seemed to relax and have a good time laughing, dancing, posing and crossing her eyes for Raja's cell phone camera. She had looked great with a cute headband in her dark curly hair with the cute blonde streak at the front, and once she'd taken her cropped white sweater off, she showed off a lace top tucked into tight red pants. She was shorter than Raja, especially in the heels Raja liked to wear on her nights out. Raja found Manila fit quite nicely with her head tucked under her chin, and Raja's hands exploring her waist and back. Raja had been wearing a backless black jumpsuit and a striped blazer that became more of a chair decoration once the night got going.

Contemplatively, Raja picked up another scoop of the bean salad she'd been having for lunch and ate it. Manila had a nervous energy about her, for reasons unclear to Raja. She was beautiful and sweet and Raja had enjoyed her company so far. In fact, she definitely planned on getting her into bed again, quite soon. Raja likes to get what she wants. 

The next day Raja awoke early, padded around her apartment and prepared herself some coffee. She lounged in leggings and an oversized t-shirt at the small kitchen table with her black and grey hair in a loose bun. While eating breakfast, she checked her work email (fashion never sleeps, darling) and browsed the internet for a while. Then she did her morning yoga. A few sun salutations in the winter light and she was feeling limber and ready to go. Just then her phone buzzed and she saw a text.  
'See you soooooon :)' 12:10am -ManilaLuzon

It was January and the weather was no joke. After some debate over whether to wear the tan hunting pants or high waisted loose jeans with leggings underneath, she went with the layers, adding a heavy brown leather jacket over top, with a wool sweater underneath, and a scarf. She debated with the hat for a while, got lost in a small runway fantasy featuring hats made entirely of hair, and then threw the hat in her bag. The amount of wind would make the hat decision for her. 

At exactly 1:03pm Raja pulled up next to Manila's building and honked. She'd added vintage Raybans to her look, seeing as the sky had decided to clear and it was now a beautiful, if freezing day. Manila walked out of the building and ran up to Raja's car, giving her a happy wave. She opened the back door and tossed her bag on the seat. Manila then got in the passenger side and gave Raja a big smile. 

"Hey girl," Raja greeted her, revving the engine a little, "Ready to have a good time?"

Manila laughed, "Yup, I can't wait. It's cold today!"

"Yeah, I wasn't really expecting it go below zero," Raja said, putting the car in gear.

"I actually really like it when the weather's like this," Manila added, "Like y'know it's cold but the sun is out and everything is bright!"

"Mmmm, I understand, but I prefer summer..." Raja laughed.

"Ah well, you'll just have to get used to it."

"Apparently so!"

The drive went without incident, Manila directing Raja to the parking lot. They got out of the car, and feeling the wind Raja decided to put on her hat. While Manila went around the car to get her bag, Raja got a better look at what she was wearing. Manila was wearing black track pants with a classic double white stripe down the side, clearly made of a thick material, and a bright yellow sweater, bulky with what appeared to be a several other sweaters underneath. And, on top of all that a toque emblazoned with the name of some sports team Raja didn't recognize. It wasn't a bad look, Manila's gorgeous black hair fanned out from underneath the hat. But it wasn't exactly what Raja had been expecting from the normally quite feminine woman. Or for what was supposed to be a romantic walk in the park. But maybe Manila liked to prioritize staying warm.

"You're looking butch today," Raja said, with a grin.

"Hahaha, well yeah," Manila rose, bag in hand and added, "If I'm going to go skating outdoors I like to dress properly!"

Raja's grin dropped. Skating? Oh. She recalled the conversation and realized that when Manila had asked her out she'd blindly agreed, assuming from the location it was going to be an (albeit cold) walk in the park. If she'd actually paid attention… she could've prepared… or something? Raja didn't know how to skate.  
Manila hadn't noticed Raja's surprise and walked around the car to join her, "There are only so many winter date possibilities, um…. did you bring any skates?"

"Ah no, I don't own any," Raja tried to put some confidence in her voice. 

"Cool! You can just rent them, it's free." Manila said happily, and took Raja's hand.

Well, Raja thought, there's no backing out now.

The location was set up like this: there was a building that held the skate rentals, a bathroom and an indoor room where you could lace up or stay warm on a freezing cold day. Outside of that was an area with low wooden benches, and cubbies underneath to stash shoes and bags. Next to all of this was an Olympic sized outdoor speed skating oval. It was easily the largest section of ice Raja had ever seen.

"So, I'm going to find a spot out here and lace up," said Manila, "the rentals are inside, they hold your ID for the skates and then give it back at the end!" Raja nodded.

"Okay," continued Manila, "see you in a bit!" She went over and sat down on a wooden bench, and took a pair of beat up old hockey skates out of her bag. She looked up and found Raja was still watching her, smiled encouragingly, crossed her eyes and stuck out her tongue. Raja winked, and walked over to the low building.

Alright, thought, Raja, I'm gonna figure this out. 

She went in the building and walked confidently towards the counter. As she waited in line, and her mind wandered. Manila was obviously prepared for the whole "skating" situation. She even had her own! What was that about. For someone who worked as a fashion illustrator it seemed unlikely that she had some kind of hidden athletic side… but here was the evidence right in front of her. But maybe she's not all that good, Raja raised her eyebrows, maybe she just picked those skates up at a thrift store last week as a fun and quirky date idea. Raja imagined the two of them sliding around on the ice and clinging to each other, laughing. Yes, that could work.  
The woman working at the rentals desk caught her eye. 

"Hello!"

"Hi," said Raja, "I uh, I need to rent some skates."

"You came to the right place," The woman joked. She had the same bright red sweater that the other employees were wearing. Her hear was a cute afro, and she had an eyebrow piercing. "Hockey or figure skates?" 

"Uhm," and Raja's mind blanked like a deer in the headlights, "uh."

"Have you skated before?" the woman asked kindly. 

Raja glanced at her name tag, "Renae. That's a nice name. No, I haven't skated before." She flashed a winning smile.

"Okay," said Renae, catching her drift, "would you say you have good balance?"

"Yes?" Raja replied.

"I'm going to recommend hockey skates for you today. They have a slightly curved blade that's easier to, like propel yourself forward. They're pretty easy to learn on! There is some debate about this, because figure skates have a flat blade which is easier for balance, but they also have picks at the end which you can trip over."

"Okay." Raja said, not really following.

Renae nodded at her, amused, "Alright. What size are your feet?"

"Women's size ten."

"Great! I'll get those for ya." Renae turned and disappeared into the racks of skates. Raja turned around quickly and glanced out the window. She could see Manila checking her phone.

"Here ya go!" Renae plopped the pair of unnervingly large and sharp skates on the counter. 

"O-kay," said Raja, nodding.

"So you just hand me your ID and we'll hold that while you're out skating and then when you return the skates you get it back."

"Gotcha," said Raja, still staring at the skates.

"Um."

"Yeah?"

"You need help lacing them up?"

"Uh…"

"We do that sometimes for people that are new to this..." Renae smiled at her.

"Right," said Raja, and turned around again to check on Manila.

"Looking to impress someone?" Renae said, and Raja turned around quickly.

"No," Raja shook her head, "just a date, you know. Thanks for the offer, but I'll figure it out!"

"Yeah, I get it," Renae nodded knowingly, "just tie them up real tight, like tighter than seems reasonable, it's the best way to support your ankles."

"Okay, I'll do my best!" Raja laughed, and put her ID on the counter.

"Raja… that's a pretty name," Renae winked at her.

"Thanks for your help, Renae," Raja said, turning and smoothly making her way back out to the benches.

000

Raja walked over to Manila, armed with women's size 10 ice hockey skates that she'd just rented from the cute queer woman in the little building.

"Hey!" Manila greeted her.

"Hey lady," Raja said, sitting next to her, and putting the skates down on the ground. She still wanted to impress Manila, so she'd thought out the logical way to proceed in the skate-tying part of this exercise. She took one boot off and examined the skate, then gripping the sides she shoved her foot into it.

Manila was talking away next to her as Raja attempted to understand the laces, "Did you see that Hannah Hart has a new video out today? I just noticed it! Anyway, I love My Drunk Kitchen…" Manila continued, and Raja glanced over at her feet. Her skates were on and tied up tight, with the long extra laces wrapped around the back. Hmmm… perhaps Manila was more of an expert at this than Raja had realized. That was okay. Raja yanked on the laces with hands that were rapidly getting cold. Renae had said to just get it real tight… but the tension kept slipping as she worked her way up.

Okay, she had a lot of extra lace now that she'd got to the top. Hmmm. She tied it in a knot that felt relatively tight and moved on to the next one.

By the time she'd got the second one tied up, Manila had stopped talking and was watching her. Raja looked at her big eyes and smiled confidently, "Ready to go?"

"Yup!" said Manila, and stood up off the bench, balancing perfectly.

Raja imitated her, but a bit more slowly and awkwardly. She adjusted her jacket and gloves and gave Manila a flirtatious look, before stumbling and almost falling. 

"Oh!" said Manila, reaching out and supporting Raja, "You good?"

"Yeah, it's just been a while, no worries." Raja laughed, and silently wondered that if balancing on the rubber mats was this bad, how the hell was she going to do  
this on the ice.

"Okay, let's go!" said Manila, turning and walking over to the entrance. Raja followed at a slower pace, feeling like an awkward newborn foal.  
When Manila stepped onto the ice, any awkwardness she'd displayed balancing on the mats was gone. She glided out a little and then turned on the spot to look back at Raja, a huge grin on her face. Raja held tightly onto the railing and stepped onto the ice. She did not trust her feet, and gripped the railing with both hands. Feeling out her balance, she let go with one hand and tried to move forward a bit. It worked, she slid forward gently, keeping a her right hand tight on the railing.  
She glanced over at Manila who was watching her, now with a quizzical expression while gliding slowly backwards. Struggling to maintain her confident demeanour, Raja took another step forward. Her brain was blanking completely on what to do next. Then suddenly a part of her said, fuck it, let's go for broke. She took a deep breath and pushed off from the wall towards Manila, who's eyes widened and lips parted in the beginning of a smile, and for a glorious moment Raja was gliding-

But Raja's ankles buckled outwards and the shift in balance sent her torso forward, arms flying out in front of her she unceremoniously tumbled onto her elbows and knees, which slid out from under her into a true and complete face plant.

"Oh no! Raja!" she heard Manila cry, and within a second there she was next to her, helping her up. "Are you hurt?"

Raja shook her head. As Manila helped her up, she felt a laugh beginning deep in her chest, and she let it bubble over until she was guffawing loudly. Manila joined  
in, lead her off the ice back onto the rubber and sat her down on a bench. 

When their laughter died down, Raja put her arm around Manila and said, "I really seriously can't fucking skate."

"Yeah," replied Manila, "I can see that. Um," she paused, and looked at Raja, "do you want me to help you?"

"Yeah," said Raja, "I do."

"Why didn't you say anything earlier?"

"I, uh," Raja leaned her head back, feeling embarrassed, "I didn't realize we were going skating today cause I got distracted while you were telling me what the plan was, so I kinda agreed blindly. And then once we were here I just wanted you to see me as confident and in control and not… goofing around not knowing how to skate. But I should've just told you."

"Huh," said Manila, processing, "I totally thought you knew what we were doing today! I'm sorry it was such a surprise!"

"Oh my god don't apologize it's so my fault."

"That's true. But it's kinda cute," Manila smiled, "Don't worry about not being like perfect at something… especially something random like skating, it's such a specific skill, haha. And if you don't know whats up, just ask! I''m sure you'd do the same for me!"

"Yeah, I appreciate that. And I will accept your offer to help. Let's get back on the ice and hopefully I won't fall down again," Raja laughed, gently head-butting Manila. She was glad they were on the same page, her embarrassment fading.

"Okay let's start with those skates," said Manila, getting off the bench and onto her knees. She quickly began to loosen Raja's laces. 

"You know…" said Raja, raising an eyebrow. Manila looked up at her. "I'd hoped you end up on your knees in front of me at some point today but I didn't expect it to be so soon." 

Manila snorted laughter and smacked Raja's knee, "You wish." 

Raja giggled, then watched as Manila re-laced her skate, pulling each criss-crossing lace tight, and then holding the tension in the cross with her thumb as she moved up to the next one. Impressive.

"So uh, why are you so good at this?" Raja asked, "Like I said before, seems butch of you…"

"Mmm, yeah, just a sec," Manila gripped Raja's skate between her knees while she pulled the topmost laces tight, and tied the knot, "I grew up in Minnesota, and uh I was from a hockey family, like all my brothers played it growing up so I did too. Like I have literally laced up the skates of so many kids-" she proceeded to tie the other skate, "and yeah, it's just been something I've stuck with for a long time. Now that I live here I visit this Oval pretty often just to keep up with skating, it's meditative and a good workout if you do intervals and stuff."

"Wow, that's so fucking butch." Raja was impressed.

"I know…" replied Manila embarrassedly. "This is like the only butch thing about me." 

"Who knew you'd secretly be a sports star?"

"Hahaha! I'm not on that level yet." She put Raja's foot down. "Here ya go. Let's get out there!"

Raja stood up, holding Manila's hand. She felt much better. Definitely out of her element but it was better than last time. They walked over the ice. Manila helped her onto the surface. Raja was unsteady and leaned on Manila for balance. 

"I think you're too tall for those little skate-aid things the kids have," Manila joked.

"I could use an adult-sized one."

"You'll be fine, just keep your knees bent." Manila switched around with a flick of her hips so that she was in front of Raja, facing her and holding both her hands, "Here, try pushing your foot sideways rather than back."

Raja tried it, and it sort of worked. She jerked a little, but Manila held her up just fine. A giggle left her.

"Okay, other foot, you've got this."

The wind blew and they continued slowly around the rink, Raja cautiously getting used to the motions and Manila skating backwards, holding her up. There were little kids zipping around way faster than Raja was even remotely capable of, and a few people dramatically speed-skating, but there were plenty of people learning too. It was a really comfortable environment. They chatted about work and youtube videos and stories from their friends. 

When they finally got all the way around, Raja grabbed the railing and said, "I want to see you do something cool."

"Oh?" Manila's eye widened at the challenge. "How cool are we talking?"

"Show me some… I don't know, skating tricks? Is that a thing?"

"Okay," Manila turned and glanced down the rink, the crowd had filtered out a bit by now. She turned back and winked at Raja, "Watch this."

Manila did an overstep side start and sprinted down the ice, the powerful strokes of her legs sending her out at top speed. Raja was surprised at how fast she was. Manila was bent forward and she whipped her body around the turn, legs smoothly crossing over one another, picking up even more speed, pumping her arms. She powered down the straight section, dodging other skaters. Raja kept an eye on her yellow sweater, tracking her manoeuvres. Manila powered around the bottom curve, a wicked smile on her face. She bore down on Raja, who just stared for a moment. But Manila wasn't stopping. Spooked, Raja started to back up against the railing and move out of the way, and then Manila turned her body to the side and pulled back into a dramatic stop, skates sending up a wave of snow as she slid to a halt right in front of Raja. Manila winked. Raja gulped, impressed and a little turned on. 

"Damn," she said.

"Aw thanks," said Manila, all smiles. "Can I take you for a ride?"

"A what?"

Manila grabbed Raja's hand, said, "Just keep your knees bent and don't think about it too much," and started to take deeper strides, pulling Raja behind her. They built up some speed and Raja could feel every little bump in the ice.

"Oh my god this is so fast!" yelled Raja, as they went into the turn. Manila gained speed with her crossover strides and let Raja swing out beside her as Raja shrieked and cursed. Raja was sure she was about to spin out of control, but Manila remained steady and brought Raja back behind her, slowing down a little bit. Raja felt like a goofy teenager again, but she was enjoying it.

"This is totally how butch hockey chicks impress their girlfriends isn't it?" Raja said.

"Hahaha," Manila laughed, "I guess so, I haven't really taken anyone on a skating date recently."

"So it's just me that you've designed this torturous afternoon for?"

"Aw that's not fair, you're totally having fun." With that, Manila accelerated into the second curve, bringing Raja around at high speed, causing her to scream again and laugh and almost fall. But she managed to right herself. 

They skated some more, Manila helping Raja become more confident. By the end she was skating slowly by herself unsupported, with Manila languidly skating figure-eights around her. 

Once they were both cold and sweaty they came off the ice and sat down. Raja managed to unlace her skates and get them off herself with much teasing from Manila. She was feeling great. It had been an unusual afternoon, and she realized she hadn't really been that vulnerable with anyone in a long time. Raja liked to be in control and project confidence, generally by sticking to things she was good at. It was refreshing, despite all the silliness that had led up to it. Not to mention her seeing how much Manila enjoyed skating and how confident she was on the ice. Raja felt good about it. 

They stood up and went back inside together to return the skates. When they approached the counter Raja was surprised to see Renae from earlier holler "Hey girl!" at Manila.

Manila waved and said, "Hi! What's up?"

"Nothing much, I see you brought someone out with you finally."

"Oh yeah, Raja this is my friend Renae!" Manila said.

"We've met!" said Renae, smiling at Raja.

"Oh really?"

"Yes," confirmed Raja, "She got me the skates and gave me some good advice… which I kind of failed at by the way."

"Don't worry about it!" Renae laughed, and Raja put the skates up on the counter. She got out Raja's ID and gave it back, then chatted briefly with Manila.

"-anyway, I've gotta keep working but I'll see you tomorrow!" Renae said.

"Yeah, see you then!" replied Manila, waving.

"And be sure to treat her right," Renae said to Raja, winking.

"Uh," said Raja, "I'll do my best." She glanced over at Manila, who was shaking her head, smiling. 

They walked slowly back through the parking lot, shivering a little in the wind.

Raja asked, "So how do you know Renae? Do you come here that often?"

"No, haha," Manila laughed, "I know her from the rec hockey team."

"What!?"

"Yeah I play in an LGBT league," said Manila, "There are a bunch of really cool queer ladies I know from it, and me and Renae are pretty close."

Raja was surprised, "So you're like really into this skating thing, huh?"

"Yeah kinda," said Manila, "It's a whole lot of fun and it was good way to make friends when I first moved here."

"That's great," replied Raja, "I'm just a little surprised that's all, but it's really cool that you have such a solid hobby."

"Aw thanks! I've had people be kind of intimidated before, so I'm happy that you seem to get it!"

"I'm not saying I'm not intimidated" said Raja, winking, "Now that you've shown off your macho butch side I'm not sure how I'll compete!" She supposed she was going to have to get used to going skating more often… 

"I had a good time at the club with you last weekend," said Manila, "you looked so great and you're such a good dancer!"

"Yeah, I am," Raja preened at the compliment.

Manila giggled.

They reached the car and Raja asked, "Do you want to come over to my place?"

"Okay!" replied Manila, nodding "Yeah that'd be nice!"

"Great."

Raja put the car in gear and they drove back to her place. She turned up the radio and they chatted a bit about music until they got there. When they arrived they went up the stairs and took off a few of their layers. Raja's gaze lingered on Manila as she took off her bright yellow sweater, followed by a green one and a black one and finally she was just in a tight fitting maroon long sleeved shirt. She noticed Raja watching.

"That's a few sweaters you've got there," she teased.

"Hey! I've gotta keep warm! It's all about strategic layering," Manila laughed, picking up her sweaters and attempting to hang them up. Raja hung up her brown leather coat on a hanger and put it in the closet, then then went into the kitchen and put the kettle on to boil. She rooted around in her cupboards for some hot chocolate, and luckily found some. She showed it to Manila, who had wandered into the kitchen behind her.

"Awesome," said Manila. She leaned up against the counter and smiled, "This is such a nice place!"

"Thank you," replied Raja. She edged closer to Manila, reaching up to get some mugs down. 

It occurred to Raja that she had about a minute until the kettle boiled. She leaned back against the counter and shifted until she was next to Manila, their sides just touching.

"Hey," she said, "I had a really nice time with you today. That was fun."

"Aw, thanks," said Manila, looking down and blushing, "I did too."

"You want to do it again sometime?"

"Yeah, for sure!" Manila quirked an eyebrow, "Maybe you'll end up even faster than me."

"That's unlikely," Raja laughed, paused and leaned down close to Manila, "I want to kiss you right now, is that cool?" 

She heard Manila inhale quickly.

"Yeah."

Raja leaned in and kissed her gently. Manila returned the kiss and put her arm around Raja's waist. Raja was loving the soft feeling of Manila's lips against hers, and that particular smell of her, and her face flushed from the cold air, and that hand caressing her waist and-

The kettle boiled. Manila pulled back and said, "Uh, I think the kettle's boiled?"

"Yeah," Raja nodded, a little dazed, "Let me deal with this hot chocolate just a sec." She put the powder in the mugs, added the water and stirred it in, then added milk and little bit of honey.

Manila had turned away and was looking at the pictures and takeout menus and magnets that adorned Raja's fridge.

"Let's go to the couch," Raja said, holding the mugs.

They proceeded into the living room. Manila curled up in the corner of couch with many pillows, and Raja sat against the arm of the couch with her legs crossed. Sitting with Manila and sharing a warm drink and chatting was absolutely lovely. Raja could definitely get used to this. The other woman was interesting, goofy and funny. Manila clearly had a variety of interests and Raja was enjoying learning about them and her life. Not to mention she was really cute and had an infectious laugh. She was feeling very good about this.

Later in the evening, after Manila had left, Raja collapsed into bed with a satisfied sigh. It had been a good day. Raja found she was strongly looking forward to the next time they'd be able to see each other. It would certainly be soon. Her phone dinged.

goodnight raja ! 11:31pm

Raja smiled and typed out a quick reply.

see you soon ;) 11:32pm

 

End


	2. East Coast Rainbow LGBT Ice Hockey League Tuesday Night Ladies Grudge Match!

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The things she'll do for love, damn it. Raja's going to see Manila's game tonight, and it's her first time being in an arena... ever? This is going to be interesting.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey folks thanks for checking out chapter 2. this story is pretty much turning into a Hockey AU so... yeah lol  
> Hope you enjoy!

Raja wasn't exactly nervous, per se. She and Manila had been dating for two months now, and despite a slightly shaky beginning they'd fallen into the habit of seeing each other fairly regularly. They'd get together about twice a week, usually saving every Saturday afternoon and evening for their dates. However, tonight was a Tuesday. And that meant one thing:  
Game night.  
For Manila, that is. In a few short hours Raja was going to attend her first hockey match, ever, and see Manila play.  
The conversation had happened like this:

000

Four days earlier:

They lay in bed together, Manila turned towards Raja with an arm slung over her waist. Raja had her arm circled protectively over Manila's shoulders, and the other propping her head up. The small lamp on Raja's bedside table made everything seem soft, matching the orange-yellow tones from the streetlight outside. Manila's eyes were closed but Raja's were open and she watched Manila breathing gently within her halo of wavy black hair, featuring a striking blonde streak.

"Argh," Manila sighed softly, "I should get dressed and go…"

Raja said nothing.

Manila sighed and started to get up, lifting her head.

"You could stay," Raja offered, quietly. Manila stilled, considering.

"Yeah, uh," Manila replied, looking up at Raja, "I guess I could."

"Okay, that'd be nice," said Raja, grinning as Manila snuggled back in beside her, "Do you have any plans tomorrow morning?"

"Not in the morning, but I have hockey practice later," said Manila, yawning. 

"Sounds good," said Raja and then she yawned as well. They were quiet for a moment, just listening to the other breathe.

"Oh I just remembered," said Raja, "there's a gallery opening for a textile artist I'm interested in on Tuesday, do you want go together?"

"Aw, I'm sorry I can't, Tuesday is game night," Manila groaned, "but it sounds good though, maybe we can go see the show later in the week?"

"Yeah, I'd still be down for that," replied Raja, thinking.

"There'll be some interesting textiles at my game, that's for sure," said Manila.

"What?"

"Oh y'know, some highly distressed jersey, some vintage padding and equipment that's literally never been washed," Manila laughed, "One of a kind! Now with a radical boundary-pushing smell-scape! Not to mention what some of the crowd shows up in."

"Oh my god." Raja rolled her eyes, and replied dryly, "The important and ultra-rare textiles of Manila's nasty hockey bag: the comprehensive collection."

"I've only ever loved fashion," drawled Manila.

"I can tell." Raja raised an eyebrow, and then she tickled Manila's side, Manila shrieked and rolled away from her.

"Hey! Hahahaha, oh my god, stop!" Manila squealed, but Raja was quick and rolled as well, pinning Manila with her legs and tickling her mercilessly for a few seconds until she relented. Manila's laughter died down and then she moved over and kissed Raja. Raja watched her contemplatively for a moment.

"I suppose I could come to your game instead."

"Oh, are you sure?" replied Manila.

"I think so," said Raja, "and I need to see if you're as good at this so-called sport as you say."

Manila laughed, suddenly nervous, and then said, "It's the only way for you to find out! Okay, well yeah I guess so? The team is pretty close so it would kind of be like you're meeting my friends, I mean if you want to meet them? Obviously you don't have to, you can keep your distance. It's kind of like a community event, I don't know, there's a lot of like families. Also there tend to be weird people hanging out at the arena sometimes… But also there's fries. And beer. Oh and you'll need to dress kind of warm it's an air-conditioned-"

"Manila."

"What?"

"You're rambling."

"Sorry," said Manila, and she yawned, "We'll just see how it goes. I'm almost ready to go to sleep, how 'bout you?"

"Oh, I don't know," said Raja, raising an eyebrow, "I'm feeling a little hungry."

"Okay we can get a snack or whatever-"

"That's not what I want to eat." Raja replied and rolled on top of Manila, kissing her neck.

Manila gasped and giggled as Raja worked her way down Manila's torso, forgetting about ice hockey completely.

000

But Tuesday rolled around, and Manila had texted Raja the time and place of the match, as well a description of where to sit to get the best view. Raja was nervous, but she knew that Manila had dedicated a lot to this sport, so she thought it would be worth investigating. Sometimes when Raja was nervous about something she'd tell herself that the experience was merely anthropological research. Sometimes that worked. 

What does one wear to a hockey match? Raja wanted to look good, obviously. She was in the fashion industry for a reason. She picked out a pair of skinny jeans that were just loose enough to fit a pair of leggings underneath. She'd learnt well from Manila's constant enthusiasm about the power of wearing layers in cold conditions. Overtop she wore a dress shirt with a long necklace, for potentially going out afterwards. And then a sweater, and then her mid-length navy wool peacoat. Fashion in winter was so irritating, it was hard to actually stay warm without looking basic. She frowned at herself in the mirror. No, the wool coat wouldn't do, not paired with jeans anyway. Raja pulled out her reliable vintage brown leather jacket, a wool sweater underneath, and kept the jeans. Practical. She produced a soft white scarf from the back of her closet and wore that as well. Her makeup was done just right, subtle with a touch dramatic darkness around her eyes. Looking good.  
She glanced at the time, and swore. She was going to be late. She grabbed her car keys and messenger bag and ran out the door. Then she ran back in the door, looked around frantically for another sweater, and threw it in her bag. Layers.

Raja parked and walked quickly into the arena. She found the hallway leading out to the bleachers quickly and walked up to find a seat in the middle. It was a relatively small community arena with only a few rows of seats around the rink, going up on a sharp angle. There was a path running around the top of the seating and people were hanging around and chatting. Everything was pretty old and dingy, but someone had gone to effort of keeping the glass around the rink clear and unsmudged. It was cold, that section of the building kept unheated for the ice.The building looked to be about half-full. There was some generic rock music being played at a low volume through the speakers. Raja sat down in an aisle seat, put her bag on the seat next to her and took a moment to eye up her fellow spectators. 

It was just over 60% women, and many of them were wearing windbreaker type coats with little insignias on them, indicating different sports teams. Many of them were older and butch-looking, rocking a lot of short grey hair. Most of them seemed to know each other and talking in small groups and wandering around before the game started. She looked around a bit more. She spied a large man with a long beard, talking to another man in a jean jacket, gesturing excitedly about something. There were kids running around, chasing each other through the seats, laughing. They wove in and around small groups of people and individuals, many of whom called their names and reached out to ruffle their hair. Huh, thought Raja somewhat ironically, this is a real community centre. Raja suddenly felt self-conscious and a little overdressed. But just as her discomfort was setting in she felt someone jostle her.

"Oh my gosh, excuse me ma'am," said a woman with a strong Texan accent. She had stumbled on the stairs, carrying an overlarge red purse and a small plate of french fries. 

"No worries," said Raja, staring at her.

"I can be so clumsy sometimes," the other woman said, sitting herself down in the seat across from Raja. She looked to be in her late thirties, and had big auburn hair teased high and dramatic blue eyeshadow. She was wearing a bright blue down jacket, and had a red bow in her hair. It matched her handbag. Under the jacket was a tight floral-print dress. To top it all off (or to bottom it all out) she had a pair of black, salt-stained winter boots on.

She must have noticed Raja staring, because she reached her hand out and said, "Hi there, I'm Alyssa. I haven't seen you here before!"

"Uh," Raja snapped out of her reverie and shook the woman's hand, "Hi. I'm Raja. Nice to meet you."

"You too, Rah-ja," replied Alyssa, "my daughter Laganja's playing tonight, and that, over there-" She pointed to a little dark-haired girl on the other side of the arena chasing a blond boy, "-is my other daughter, Vivienne."

"She's cute." Raja watched the kid running and laughing, "seems energetic."

"That she is," confirmed Alyssa, "but not so bad as the other one, she was a real handful. I'm glad I put her in sports, got a bit of that energy out."

"Yeah," said Raja, at a bit of a loss.

"Do you know somebody on the team?" Alyssa asked, dipping a fry in ketchup.

"Yeah," said Raja, "We're, uh, seeing each other."

"Do you mind if I ask who?" Alyssa smiled conspiratorially, tossing the fry back into her mouth, "I know most of the folks since my girl started to play for the team, you know what I'm sayin'?"

Raja snorted a little, "Yeah. Uh, yeah, I'm seeing Manila."

"Ohhhh, miss Manila Luzon, alright alright," Alyssa nodded her head and gave Raja a wink. "She's real nice."

Luckily Raja was saved from having to reply because the PA system clicked on and there was squeak of feedback that made everyone in the room wince. A few of them shaking their fists in the general direction of a small windowed booth sitting above the walkway around the top of the seating area.

"And hello hello hello everyone! Welcome to the East Coast Rainbow LGBT Ice Hockey League Tuesday Night Ladies Grudge Match! Brought to you by Cleve's Source for Sports, The LGBT Sports Coalition, The East Coast Pride Committee, Back Door Club, and Betsy's Motorcycle Garage & Auto Parts," said the man speaking over the PA system, "I'm your host, arena manager and league co-director Rick Richardson… are you ready for tonight's game?" A few cheers went up as a little organ tune played over the system, and announcer continued, "Tonight it's Mussels vs Snowstorm and here they come! Representing our home team-"

Raja couldn't decide if what she was feeling right then was anticipation or second hand embarrassment. The last time she'd been around anything this surreal, she'd been on some kind of psychedelic. Alyssa cheered as the home team players lumbered out from the underneath the stands, onto the ice. They were all wearing white jerseys with a blue stripe on the front, the rest of their equipment in various colours and states of disrepair. Most of the people that had been standing around drinking beer and chatting were filing into the stands and taking seats. She craned her neck, looking at the figures on the ice, trying to find Manila. 

The team divided out, players going onto their bench while the first line got into position on the ice. The announcer had finished reading out the names of the home team and began to read out the lineup for the opposition as they came onto the ice.

"There," said Alyssa, leaning over to Raja and pointing, "That's your girl at centre, my Laganja's playing right wing."

Raja looked, and saw Manila at centre ice skating casual figure-eights waiting for the other team to set up, with LUZON emblazoned across her back and her cloud of hair back in a poofy ponytail. She was wearing a helmet with a cage over the face. Most of the players had a cage although some seemed to have opted for a a design with a clear piece of plastic across their eyes.

The little organ tune played again, and the announcer chimed in, "Alright, we've got Luzon at centre ice facing off against O'Hara, captain of the Scarborough Snowstorm, get ready for that puck drop folks!"

What is happening, Raja thought bemusedly, how did I get here.

The ref dropped the puck and with some cheering from the audience the game got underway. It was much faster than Raja had expected, players moving quickly and snapping the puck back and forth. She kept her eyes on Manila as she rushed down the ice, weaving around the opposing team's defence while the announcer described what was happening. Alyssa was regularly leaning over and giving Raja her own personal commentary. 

"-now you see her there, the right defence? That's my good friend Shangela Wadley," said Alyssa, "She's on the line with Manila they've got great energy, oh, there she goes, did you see that!"

The player in question (Wadley) had cornered another other player coming down the ice with the puck (jersey saying C. Michaels) and cornered her against the boards. She quickly lifted Michaels' stick up with her own, turned on the spot and passed the puck to the right defence (Mattel.) Mattel passed it back up to Manila, who had swooped down into the middle, caught the puck on her turn and was powering up the ice just like Raja had seen on their skating date a couple weeks ago.

"Aaaand Luzon has the puck, she's powering up the middle flanked by Edwards, she dodges Winters, dodges Leblanc, and takes a shot!"  
Manila took a wrist shot but the goalie reached out and caught it in her glove. The crowd sighed. The whistle blew and Manila skated off to the bench, the next line hopping the boards.

"A lovely save there by K. Michaels, now for the face-off," the announcer continued. 

Raja kept on watching and to her surprise, began to enjoy the game. It was fast paced, entertaining, and it was pretty cool to see Manila doing her thing. Listening to the crowd react, and the announcer make his weird little commentary was pretty ridiculous as well. She was beginning to realize why Manila dedicated so much of her time to this. It was a fun, earnest community event. Raja cringed a little thinking that. This was the kind of thing she'd usually look down upon. And while it was certainly absurd, but it wasn't too bad.

At the end of the second period she went over to the stand and got another beer. Ah yes, she thought to herself sipping cheap beer, classic White American Sportsball culture. Hope I'm good to drive home.

The third period began with the opening face off (this time someone named MacMichaels at centre) the tension in the room had mounted. The fans were more focused on the rink and chatting less amongst themselves.

"-puck to Luzon-" Raja looked up, "she's coming down the right side, dodges the defence-" Manila snapped off a quick pass to Laganja, "-pass to Edwards-"

"Get it!" hollered Alyssa. Laganja pulled back from the oncoming left defence, stick keeping the puck close to her. Manila disentangled herself from the right defence and sprang forward towards the goalie's circle, glancing back at Laganja. Laganja dodged and snuck a pass to Manila through the right defence's legs, Manila wound up for a snapshot, but faked and flew forward with the puck, whipping around behind the goal. This happened in a couple seconds and as Manila whipped around the left wing had come down and got in front of the defence, leaving a space for Laganja to sneak in front of the net. Manila flicked a pass to Laganja who wound up and slapped it right at the goalie. The puck went in the left corner of the net. Manila and Laganja high-fived.

The crowd cheered, Alyssa leaped out of her chair and shouted, "Yasss! That's my girl!"

Raja laughed, sipped her beer and let out a cheer herself.

"-goal for Edwards with a beautiful assist from Luzon! " cried the announcer, "Somebody get that woman a drink! That's the tie point, Mussels-Snowstorm 2-2!"

"Are you enjoying yourself, Miss Raja?" Alyssa asked her as the next line set up to face off.

"Yeah actually, I am," replied Raja, smiling, "This is surprisingly alright."

"Yes we have a good community here," said Alyssa, nodding, "and it's real nice to see Laganja and Manila working together, they're a good team."

"Seems like it," nodded Raja, jumping slightly as the puck hit the glass near where they were sitting.

The action continued. There was another shot on the home teams goal, followed by Wadley chasing one of the Snowstorm's offence around the back of the net. The player lost control of the puck, send it flying up around the boards, but suddenly Manila was right there, she reached up and caught it, dropping it down in front of her and doing a quick turn, building up speed as Laganja flanked her. The other team's line was changing over, and a tall player leapt the boards and made straight for Manila. Manila had just looked over to her teammate on her left to send a pass when the big player brought her stick up and cross-checked Manila. Blindsided, Manila went flying, landing on her hands and knees. Raja's jaw dropped.

"That's a foul!" Alyssa hollered, jumping up in her seat.

"Yeah, what the fuck!" Raja stood up and yelled too.

"-and that's a big hit…." the announcer said as the whistle blew and referee came over, "But there we go that's going to be a penalty against the Snowstorm for illegal checking. Into the box with her!" The crowd booed and cheered in equal measure. Raja was frowning, watching the tall woman get rustled into the penalty box. She glanced back at Manila. She had recovered quickly, getting up, shaking her head and skating to the bench while another player leapt the boards to take her place. Another face-off began.

"Hey, does that happen a lot?" Raja asked Alyssa, who had been hollering profanity at the offending player.

"Oh, every so often there'll be a big hit," sighed Alyssa, "but this is a low-contact league so things like that are called immediately. As they should be! Did you see how she had held her stick up across Miss Manila's body? That's what's illegal. And it is right to be. I don't like that at all. People fall of course and injuries happen… and some contact is okay. Like if you just kinda," she did a little swing with her hips, "y'know, move someone off the puck, that's allowed, even if they hit the boards in the process."

"-and here we go on a power play for the Mussels-" the announcer continued.

Raja nodded to Alyssa and looked down at the bench where Manila was sitting. She was talking to the person next to her, and drinking from her water bottle. Raja saw her laugh at something the other player said (Raja suddenly recognized it to be Renae from the skating rentals) and felt a bit better. And a little less like cutting the bitch who had the audacity to knock over Manila. She drained the last of her drink, feeling moody.

The power play was giving the team energy and she watched as they occupied the opposing end of the rink, taking shot after shot on the other team's goalie, (K. Michaels) who was defending well. The puck bounced over to the Mussels left defence, an older woman named Davis. She and Wadley passed it back and forth up at the blue line for a moment while the offensive players struggled for a clear position in front of the net. The power play clock was counting down. Raja was caught up the drama of it all. Suddenly, Davis had a clear shot -

"-and Davis makes a pass to Edwards just above the circle," the announcer boomed over the PA system "she gets it, dodges, she scores on a backhand tip!"

The crowd stood up on it's feet and roared, Laganja pumped her fist in the air and skated over to the bench. Alyssa jumped up yet again and cheered, waving down at her daughter. Laganja blew her a kiss.

Raja cheered as well, smiling, but she also noticed out of the corner of her eye that the tall player from earlier had moved from the penalty box back to her bench.

"-that's Mussels 3-2!"

The last three minutes of the game were tense but uneventful. Manila played another shift, but she wasn't on the ice at the same time as the tall player again. The end of game buzzer rang and Manila's team all piled together in a group hug. The teams shook hands and walked out off the ice. The crowd gave a final cheer, then people got up and milled around, filing out or standing together in groups chatting. Alyssa left to gather up Vivian who had run off somewhere and Raja wandered down to the hallway she'd come in, waiting for Manila by the door. Many others were waiting there as well. She indulged in a bit more people-watching, and texted her friend Raven.

Manila came out with her hair back in the same floofy ponytail, a giant red bag slung over one shoulder, stick in her other hand. She blew wisps of hair out of her eyes and looked around. Raja went forward to greet her, the other players and spectators swirling around them.

"Hey winner," said Raja.

"Hey!" grinned Manila, face sweaty. She was wearing tight fitting black athletic shirt and leggings. "You came! How did you like the game?"

"Of course I came," said Raja, a little offended, "it was… uh, different. But great! It was cool to see you do your thing."

"That's great! I'm glad you enjoyed it!" Manila laughed a little nervously, "I was kinda worried that you'd… I don't know, think it was lame."

"It's definitely not lame," said Raja, glancing around, "I just had no idea people were gonna be this enthusiastic about it."

Next to them Laganja had come around, also holding a gigantic bag. She was wearing her bright green hair down with a toque on top. Alyssa walked up and gave her a big hug, saying loudly, "Congratulations on that winning goal sweetie! Great job!" 

"Yeah good job 'Ganj!" added her little sister.

"Aw thanks Mama, thanks Vivi," replied Laganja, hugging her.

"Hey there Miss Manila," said Alyssa, moving over to give Manila a hug, "great game today!"

"Aw, thanks Alyssa, it's nice to see you!" said Manila, and gestured to Raja, "uh, Alyssa this is Raja, she came to see my game-"

"Oh honey, we met!" enthused Alyssa, "We were sittin' together!"

"Oh no way!" cried Manila, laughing, "That's so funny!"

"Yeah," confirmed Raja, nodding.

Then someone shouted from the crowd, "Hey 'Nila!"

Manila turned quickly and Raja glanced up too, it was the left defence Alyssa had pointed out, Wadley. Out of gear she had big curly hair and a contagious smile.

"What's up Shangie!" Manila called.

"We meetin' up tomorrow for the thing?"

"Yeah! I'll see you at 6!"

"Sounds good!"

"Tell your hot girlfriend I said hi!"

Raja blinked and Manila blushed and yelled something at the retreating Shangela.

"Halleloo, boo!" Shangela said in response, and left shouldering the glass door open.

Manila turned back to Raja, "You good to go?"

"Yeah, let's get out of here," Raja said, waving goodbye at Alyssa and her family.

They went out into the cold night air. Raja shivered, her outfit had been sufficient inside the rink but outside the temperature had dropped with a wicked wind chill. It was going to be a cold night. Manila seemed fine just wearing her underarmour, and she was still waving to a few of the other players (from both teams) who were getting in their vehicles.

As they approached Raja's car, Raja fumbled a bit with her keys and dropped them.

"Ugh," she sighed, and bent over to pick them up. As she stood up, the world swayed and she stumbled sideways a bit.

"Woah," said Manila, holding Raja's shoulder supportively, "you good there?"

"Uh," said Raja, "I had a few beers… maybe shouldn't drive."

Manila laughed, "That happens, I can drive you home. I haven't driven in like a year though so I might be rusty."

"Okay, I think it's fine. Did you take transit here-?"

"No, Shangela picked me up," replied Manila, unlocking Raja's car and throwing her bag and stick in the back seat, "Usually her or Alyssa volunteer cause I'm like the only one without a vehicle."

"Ugh, I remember those days," Raja threw herself into the passenger seat. "So glad I got a car…" 

She looked out the window as Manila got in the drivers side and started adjusting everything. Raja saw Alyssa and her family getting into a red truck, Laganja throwing her equipment bag and stick into the cargo bed and Vivian climbing into the backseat. 

"Okay, we're ready to roll!" said Manila, shifting into drive and peeling out of the parking lot. Raja clutched at the door for support.

"So, your first hockey game ever, what did you think?" Manila asked brightly, accelerating through a yellow light.

"Uh, it was pretty great," said Raja, "awesome to see you get that goal. Seems like a pretty fun atmosphere, like in the arena? And it was good to meet Alyssa, she's funny."

"Aw thanks! Yeah it was a good game," smiled Manila, taking a tight right turn, "Alyssa and Laganja are like my second family at this point. Sorry if I'm kinda chatty by the way - I always feel pretty pumped up after games but also like tired and bruised at the same time, haha. Did you see that part where-"

Manila chatted on about the game a she took a rapid left. The turn rocked Raja in her seat and she thought to herself, this is the last time I'm letting Manila drive.

"So," Raja laughed, "what was with that tall chick knocking you over?"

"Oh," said Manila, and to Raja's surprise her face darkened for a moment, "that was just an illegal hit, it happens sometimes. Kinda shitty but I'm not hurt! Like you wear so much padding in this damn sport that falling down doesn't hurt at all it's great!" But her smile seemed forced.

"Is that team particularly aggressive or-?" Raja examined her nails, waiting patiently for Manila's reply.

They were approaching a yellow light, and as it turned red Manila slammed the brakes.

"Snowstorm? Nah not really, they've got a bunch of great people," Manila said, drumming her fingers against the steering wheel, "Like Kameron used to be our goalie but then she moved, and then we had this whole issue where we had to recruit a goalie, oh and I really like Sharon-"

"What about that girl that hit you?"

"Uh, Acid Betty?"

"Is that her name?"

"Yeah - oh it's green." Manila hit the accelerator and Raja once again grabbed onto the door for support. She let the subject drop, instead teasing Manila about her energetic driving.

They spoke about work and by the time Manila pulled up at Raja's place she was happy and smiley again.

"I'll call a cab real quick," said Manila, and Raja stepped out of the car. She opened the back door and wrangled Manila's equipment bag out. It was bulky and heavy, but Raja managed to throw it over her shoulder like she had seen Manila do before. 

Manila grabbed her stick and they went inside to wait for the cab. They chatted idly and Manila scrounged in Raja's fridge for a snack. When the cab rolled up outside, Raja gave Manila a big hug and lingering kiss.

"I'll see you Saturday?" said Raja softly.

"Yeah," replied Manila, "Let's go see that textile show."

"Sounds good."

"Can't wait!"

Manila left and got in the cab.

Raja let out a big exhale. It had been a very different night. People that play sports were so weird. As she pulled on her pyjamas she thought about Manila skilfully moving around the ice and the intensity and joy she brought to the activity. Raja paused. She might really be falling for this girl. Hmmm.


	3. Going Out On The Town

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Raja takes Manila out to her favourite club to meet her friends

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> this one took me a while, probably because there's not enough hockey in it lol but i think it's pretty fun, we get to meet some of Raja's fashionable friend circle. i tried hard not to quote the Joel Plaskett song Fashionable People and it almost worked.

It was a Friday. Raja was in her kitchen cooking dinner and listening to blaring Indonesian language radio. She tuned in from time to time to an Indonesian national news site, which offered online radio streaming. It was a good way to keep up with the language and events that the American media didn't cover. The random assortment of vegetables on her cutting board hit the hot pan with a sizzle and she stirred them and checked the rice. She was going out tonight to the club she and her close friends in the fashion world liked to frequent. That in itself wasn't unusual, but this time Manila was coming along to meet her group. She had been anticipating the evening all week, and was ready to be social. Raja stirred the vegetables some more and poured on a homemade spicy sauce, singing along to a catchy jingle on the radio.

Later, once everything had been eaten, put away and cleaned, Raja put on some music and flung open the doors of the walk-in closet. She didn't just want to look good, she wanted to look hot and powerful. She indulgently ran her tattooed hands over the different textures in her collection. There was something soothing about touching the different fabrics, especially natural fibres such as silk. 

A little while later after much deliberation, stroking of fabric and posing in front of the mirror, Raja had decided on her outfit. She wore a top with two strips of rough black fabric with gold chain running along it that attached behind the back of her neck, and plunged low, connecting to a snakeskin strip that sat on her waist. It was lined with a gentle cotton and didn't irritate her skin, but offered a dramatic textural look. She loved the way the open back and limited material showed off her smooth skin and tattoos. Underneath that was a flowy pair of pants out of the same rough and distressed material as the the top. They had fine gold chain running down the sides. She added a silver pentagram necklace that sat nicely on her chest between the strips of fabric. Big silver hoop earrings framed her face and she wore her long salt and pepper hair smooth and straight. She had put on dark red lipstick and painted her nails black. She put on high heels, bringing her from her regular 5'11 to 6'3. Pausing, she dug around on the high shelf in the back of her closet and grinning, she pulled out a wide-brimmed black hat. Yes.  
She spun around and admired herself in the mirror. Raja bit her lip, thinking damn, I've still got it. Not bad. 

When Manila arrived at Raja's apartment she was wearing a nude illusion dress with black lace in a halter neck style, showing off her muscular shoulders. It was quite short and tight-fitting, the hem just covering the top of her athletic thighs. She had small black boots with silver buttons. Raja greeted her and then stepped back for to Manila remove her shoes.

"You look hot," murmured Raja, looking at Manila appreciatively.

"Thanks! Renae actually dared me to get this dress a little while ago and it's the first time I've worn it!" said Manila, pulling down the hem of her dress, "You do too, you look like a sexy witch."

Raja burst out laughing. Manila grinned too, and tossed her jacket on the back of a chair.

"Yeah I think it might be the necklace," said Raja, checking her black nails for any dust or blemishes.

"That and the hat," teased Manila, giving Raja a hug around the waist. With Raja in heels Manila only reached her shoulder. 

"Aw," said Raja, holding Manila tight in the hug and resting her chin on top of her head, "You're so tiny!"

"Hey!" exclaimed Manila, standing up on her toes, "5'6 is not tiny!"

"Yes it is." Raja squeezed her a little.

"No!" said Manila, mock-offended, extracting herself from Raja's grip, "You're just like a million feet tall - believe me, I know tiny people," she drew herself up proudly, "my mom is only 5'1!"

"You've inherited her height," drawled Raja.

"No way!" said Manila, laughing and walking around Raja into the kitchen, "I am a tall aggressive fucking hockey player, look!" She put up her arm and flexed her bicep, "I'm a menace!"

"I'm so scared." Raja walked over and gave her a gentle kiss, careful not to smudge either of their lipstick, then she went into the kitchen, calling over her shoulder, 

"D'you want a drink?"

"Yeah!" said Manila brightly, following Raja. She leaned against the counter while Raja poured a gin and tonic and handed it to her. Manila took a sip. Raja quickly prepared another for herself.

"So," said Raja. She leaned against the opposite counter and put one hand in the crook of her elbow while the other held her drink, "Are you excited?"

"Yeah!" said Manila, "I'm like… well I'm kinda nervous but I am excited!"

"Yeah? Don't worry, they'll like you."

"I hope so, ugh! They're probably all really cool!" said Manila, fidgeting, "I mean you've met most of my friends and their all just like… assorted hockey weirdos."

Privately, Raja agreed. Manila's crowd was much less intimidating than hers, and Raja's friends from the fashion world could be judgemental. 

"I was nervous going to your game," admitted Raja, "it was a new environment for me, and I get it this is a new one for you too, but honestly," she stepped forward and held Manila's shoulders, "Don't even worry about it. It'll be fine. You look hot, I look hot, we're going dancing and some of the weirdos I know will be there. That's all." She delicately kissed the top of Manila's head, just left of the blonde streak.

"Thanks for saying that," Manila sighed, "I know it'll be fine, I appreciate you saying that."

"Yeah? Well I appreciate that ass, so-"

"Raja!"

They laughed and finished their drinks. Manila seemed to be in a much better mood once the conversation changed over to a different subject, although she still had that undercurrent of nervous energy that Raja had observed before. Oh well, thought Raja, nothing to do but dive in. Raja called a cab and they got ready to go. Manila put on her leather jacket and boots. 

000

The cab ride was uneventful, and they stepped out into the cold night air. Raja could see the vintage neon sign advertising her favourite club, and she made a beeline towards it, dodging the few people who were out walking on the street. Even though it was cold, it was a Saturday night and partying was on the minds of many. They walked in, Raja leading. Depositing their coats at the coat check, Raja surveyed the room. Things were as they usually were, low lit with sensual blue tones, music playing through the sound system at a low volume since it was still relatively early. The club was only about half-full, and she quickly spied her friends at their usual table in the corner, lounging on the rounded black and blue leather couches. Raja turned and took Manila's hand, leading her over to the bar. While Raja ordered their drinks, Manila turned and was leaning back against the bar looking around at the room. She kept reaching to tug down the hem of her dress. 

"Here you go," the bartender handed them their drinks. Raja accepted them and handed the more colourful one over to Manila. 

"Do you like it?" Raja asked in a low voice.

"Yeah this is really cool," said Manila, shifting self-consciously and pulling down the hem of her dress again. 

"Don't worry about that, you look great, your legs look fierce," said Raja, nudging her, "Come on, my group's over here." She led Manila through the room, weaving easily around the tables and small groups of people.

"Good evening ladies!" she announced, arriving at her friends' table. Manila shyly walked up and stood beside her.

"Hey Raja," crooned a pale young woman with spiky black hair, "ugh, long time no see! How are you?" She stood up and gave Raja a hug. 

"Hey Aquaria," Raja said, "I'm good, how are you? Let me introduce you, this is Manila."

"Hi Manila," Aquaria said coolly. She leaned in and gave Manila a hug, which Manila received somewhat stiffly, "Are you the reason we haven't seen Raja out and about in so long?"

"Um yeah? I guess," replied Manila, looking confused.

"I'm just kidding," laughed Aquaria, "You're the sports player, right?"

"Yeah, I play hockey - I also do graphic design, I work in fashion too," Manila replied.

"Interesting," said Aquaria, giving her a look of assessment, "I'm a photographer, but I occasionally model."

"Anyway, let me introduce you to the rest of group," said Raja, who had been watching the exchange and noted Aquaria's somewhat predatory look, "This is Raven-" she pointed to a beautiful woman with short blonde hair and a tight leather dress. 

"Hi," Raven stuck out her hand, but didn't get up from her seat. Manila leaned down a little to shake her hand.

"Hi! I'm Manila."

"Nice to meet you," Raven purred and let Manila's hand drop.

"You too!" Manila replied, "Um, Raja's told me so much about you! You two go way back right?"

"Yes," said Raven, cocking her head sideways, "I've known Raja for fifteen years, we got our start in fashion together and she's one of my best and… oldest friends."

"Hey!" Raja took a seat next to Raven and swatted her arm, "I'm not that old."

"Yes you are, especially in contrast with the lovely young women you choose to date," Raven said, turning her piercing gaze to Manila.

"Um," Manila looked down and sipped her drink.

"Girl," said Raja, rolling her eyes and pointing at Raven, "You're one to talk! Remember Jujubee?"

Raven stared at Manila for another beat, and then looked back to Raja and laughed, breaking the tension, "I guess you've got me there!"

Manila joined in the laughter half-heartedly, not exactly sure who was the butt of the joke.

"Anyway, ignore this old bitch she's bitter," laughed Raja, leaning forward and pulling at Manila's wrist, "sit down, and let me finish introducing you to people!"

Manila quickly sat down next to Raja. Raja leaned over the table and said, "Hey Naomi! I want you to meet Manila!"

Naomi turned, and Manila felt her jaw drop. Naomi was impossibly gorgeous, her long black hair perfectly straight, dramatic makeup highlighting her cheekbones and full lips. She was wearing a red leather top with various straps going across the front and Manila could see even sitting down that her legs went on for days. 

"What's up? I'm Naomi," she said in a low sultry voice.

"H-Hi. I'm Manila, nice to meet you!" Manila said, eyes wide as the stared.

"You too." Naomi smiled and held eye contact with Manila.

"She's a model," said Raja, "And you should stop drooling."

"I'm not-!" Manila quickly swiped at her mouth to make she sure hadn't actually been drooling, "Ack, sorry."

Naomi laughed and replied, "I get that a lot, don't worry. You're cute."

Manila and Naomi made small talk and Raja put an arm around Manila, feeling her shift a little as Aquaria sat down next to her, drink in hand. Raja sipped her own drink and nodded along to the music. This seemed to be going well. There were other people she knew that would likely show up tonight since this venue was frequented by some highly fashionable people. Naomi got up to talk to someone she knew. Raven asked Raja a question and she turned to answer.

Manila had turned to face Aquaria, who was playing with the straw in her glass and maintaining heavy eye contact. Manila returned the gaze and sipped her drink as well, tugging her dress down a little further to cover her thighs.

"Why do you keep doing that?" Aquaria asked Manila.

"Doing what?"

"Pulling down your dress? Is it like a nervous tick?" Aquaria cocked her head to one side.

"Oh um," Manila self-consciously crossed her legs and tried to adjust her dress again, "I just think it's a little short…"

"No it's not you look hot," replied Aquaria bluntly.

"Well, y'know, thanks. I just don't really wear dresses that often and I'm not super comfortable so…" Manila fidgeted.

"It's okay," said Aquaria.

There was a pause.

"So, uh," Manila fished for words, "uh, how do you know Raja?"

"I work at a rival company," responded Aquaria, "but we met through mutual friends a few years ago, and… let's just say we've taken a few chances getting to know each other intimately."

"Oh," said Manila, taken aback, "Did you two date?"

"No, we just made out a couple times," laughed Aquaria, "I wanna have all the experiences I can have, you know?"

"Yeah," said Manila, tentatively nodding, "I think I get that."

"But we're totally pals, like it's not even a thing," Aquaria enthused, leaning closed to Manila, "I'm glad that she's with someone, she'd been kinda drifting for a while. She seems so much happier lately!"

"Okay well, that's good!" said Manila, "I was pretty nervous about meeting everybody tonight but-"

"Don't even worry about it! Or that dress," said Aquaria, running a finger across the hem, "It's fucking cute. Oh my god! What is that?"

Manila had a large blueish bruise high on the side of her thigh that was mostly covered by the dress.

"Oh! That's just a bruise I got at shinny the other day," said Manila, shifting, "I forgot about it when I was getting dressed and then when I noticed I was like-"

"Wait, can I like, see it?" asked Aquaria, trying to get a better look at Manila's leg, "And what's 'shinny?'"

Manila laughed, and downed the rest of her drink finally feeling a little bit more comfortable. It was a bit odd that Aquaria had mentioned her casual past with Raja so quickly, but there didn't seem to be any tension between them so Manila decided to put it out of her mind. Aquaria seemed pretty weird, but unthreatening. Also, everyone likes seeing weird bruises. She stood up to show it off, peeling the hem of her dress up a little. Raja noticed the movement and turned to watch Manila with a questioning look on her face. Raven raised an eyebrow.

"So yeah, this is it," said Manila, as Aquaria leaned in and Manila showed off the mottled blue and purple oblong bruise, "I was out playing shinny, which is basically just casual pick-up hockey but only with helmets, gloves and sticks not full equipment. Anyway, I play with a group of guys and a fews girls at the shitty outdoor rink down the street, and my buddy Marco didn't notice where I was and," Manila laughed at this, "He took a quick slapshot at the goal, but like you're not supposed to raise the puck, but he had been distracted by this other guy I'd been trying to defend, between you and me and I think he's got a crush on him and anyway the puck hit me in the leg. No big deal at the time but the next day it hurt and now I've got this awesome bruise."

"Wow, you're like so tough," said Aquaria, running a finger over the bruise.

"Yeah," said Raja, who had been watching the way Aquaria stroked Manila's leg, "She really is."

Manila giggled at the tickle of Aquaria's touch and the warm feeling of alcohol in her stomach and said, "Check out this scar on my knee."

Raja continued to observe their interaction, with Manila showing off her various scars and bruises to Aquaria and another interested club-goer who had latched on. Even Raven had leaned around Raja to see. Raja was glad about Manila having fun, and seeing how she was getting along with Aquaria was nice. Even though Raja was feeling a little tinge of jealousy, she knew that Aquaria might flirt a lot but would't actually try anything with Manila. Hopefully.

"She's so… athletic," Raven commented drily.

"Eh, yeah, she likes sports," replied Raja casually. 

"Well, she seems sweet," said Raven, "Not really your type though."

"Hey, I don't have a type!" said Raja, "I'm open-minded!"

Rave just gave her a look.

"Whatever, are you done your drink?" She gestured at her own glass, which was empty, "C'mon, let's go get more." She stood up with Raven and they walked off, Raja giving Manila a little caress around the shoulders and whispering "More drinks," on her way by.

Raja and Raven stalked through the club like women on a mission. Raja was feeling better about the evening, even if still a little on edge. The fact that Manila and Aquaria were getting along so well was good, but Raven seemed to be in a bit of a mood. Of course that made sense, Raja remembered Raven had been having a difficult time at work lately. Raja could forgive that. She could feel the music getting slowly louder as more and more people entered the club. She walked by more than a couple people she recognized, saying hi and giving hugs. She was taller than many of the people in the room, and she liked that. They ordered drinks and waited for the bartender to make them.

"Did you hear about what happened with Detox yesterday?" said Raven quietly.

"No, what happened?" asked Raja.

"He yelled at one of the junior designers and she cried," said Raven, "He normally isn't like that, he never yells."

"True," said Raja, surveying the crowd, "You think he's here tonight?"

"Doubt it," said Raven, "I think he's having problems in his marriage."

"What, with Roxy?" said Raja, turning to Raven in surprise.

"Could be," Raven said simply.

"It's hard out there for the straights," Raja sighed dramatically, and Raven laughed. 

"I mean whatever, I feel bad but I work directly with him and he can't be bringing his shit to work," clarified Raven, "I'm not that upset, it's just been stressful. I'm glad we're here though, it's nice to see you."

"Ahhh," said Raja, wrapping her arms around Raven, "It's nice to see you too!"

They turned and received their drinks from the bartender, who had helpfully put them on a tray seeing as Raja had ordered for herself and Manila, and Raven had ordered for Aquaria and Naomi as well. Raja wove through the crowd with Raven, tray in hand. When she got back to where they were sitting she saw that Manila, Aquaria and Naomi had crowded together on the couch and were taking pictures with Naomi's phone. Naomi was posing and giving face to the camera, Aquaria was jokingly imitating her and Manila was laughing at them both. Raja put the drink tray down on the table and Manila lunged for her drink, bringing the straw up to her mouth and taking a large sip.

"Thanks for getting the drinks Raja!" said Manila excitedly.

"No problem," replied Raja, picking up her own drink. Raven came back and joined them and they all started listening and chatting about an upcoming photoshoot Aquaria and Naomi were collaborating on, and that Raven seemed to be providing some kind of backup for. Manila seemed interested and began talking tech about cameras and photo editing with the group, all of whom were relatively knowledgeable on these matters.

Suddenly, a blinding whir of colourful clothing and black hair hit Raja from the side.

"Oh my god!" she gasped, turned and saw her friend Asia, who had blindsided her with a hug.

"Raja! Bitch! I haven't seen you in forever!" shouted Asia enthusiastically, "Damn girl, you picked a good night to come out, my sister is DJing!"

"No fucking way, that's amazing! When does her set start?" replied Raja.

"In 10 minutes, it's going to be great," said Asia, smiling, "I've gotta go find Monique but I'll see you on the dance floor!"

"Great, you know we'll be voguing the house down," Raja gestured to her group at the table.

"Oh girl," Asia pulled back, "This is going to be a good night."

With that she vanished into the crowd.

Nice, Raja thought to herself.

The group interactions continued nicely for the next little while, everyone getting progressively drunker as Raja kept buying drinks. A couple of other people she knew came by to say hello, and Raja was starting to feel happy and tipsy. Her friends seemed to be embracing Manila, and Manila seemed to have gotten over her earlier anxiety. 

In about fifteen minutes time, the DJ started up - she was a beautiful black woman who's performance name was The Vixen. The club was getting warmer and warmer as the crowd got larger and alcohol flowed and the dancing began. With the first song blaring out a sexy dancehall beat, people piled onto the dance floor and Raja's group got up to join them. Naomi lead, strutting out and turning every head in the room. Aquaria followed, pulling Manila by the hand behind her. Raja and Raven walked over more casually, and joined their little group in the crowd. Manila was dancing jerkily and laughing at Aquaria's sensual antics. Raja smiled and let the music flow through her.

The Vixen was an incredibly talented DJ. She was layering and mixing tracks over each other, with powerful piano riffs going over top of it, and reggae and afrobeat pumping the bass underneath. Raja allowed her body to move and dance with the tune, aware of people admiring her striking figure. She moved up against Naomi and they danced and posed together. As the music started to build towards a drop, Naomi started to bend backwards, hands making shapes in the air above her. Raja danced in response to this, moving her body smoothly until she was straddling over Naomi's contorted figure and had Naomi's hands twined in hers. At the drop, Raja pulled her up out of the impossible bend she'd been doing. A few people around them cheered, including Manila.

The beat pulsing though her body, and Raja looked over at Manila. Manila was twisting and curling her body to the music, jumping up and down happily and trying to hold onto her drink. Most of it was staying in the glass. Raja smiled as Manila threw back the rest of the drink and stumbled away to put the glass down on a table, before rushing right back to the dance floor and getting down with Aquaria. Her dress fit tight around her hips and legs and Raja was enjoying watching her move. 

Raja moved away from Naomi over to Manila. She went around behind the shorter woman and delicately brushed her fingertips across Manila's shudders and down her arms. Manila glanced back and seeing Raja, smiled and pressed herself back against Raja's chest. Manila shifted her hips side to side, and Raja joined in immediately, their bodies rocking in unison. She held Manila's wrists and brought them to her stomach, holding her in a hug and leaning her chin onto Manila's shoulder. Raja breathed in the smell of her hair as they moved together. 

They kept drinking and dancing late into the night. The patrons of the club, including Raja's group, got progressively more sweaty, messy and intoxicated. It was nearing the club's closing time when Raja saw Manila stumble into Asia (who had come and gone from their group throughout the night), and knock them both over, laughing hysterically. Manila's hair tumbled across her face and strands of it stuck to her sweaty forehead as she tried to push it back and move off Asia. Asia was laughing as well, and helped Manila stand up. Raja sidled up to Manila and called a thank you at Asia, who seemed the more sober of the two.

"Hey Manila," said Raja, putting an arm around her as the crowd continued to jump and swarm around them, "I think we'd better head out soon."

"Mmm, yeah," replied Manila, unsteady on her feet, "Fuck I fell on my bruised side. That's gonna hurt tomorrow."

"Okay, let's go get our coats," said Raja turning to go.

"Wait, I wanna say goodbye!" cried Manila and launched herself back into the crowd. Raja chuckled and followed her until she arrived at their group. Manila shouted some sort of goodbye into Aquaria's ear and Aquaria groaned, then hugged her and kissed her cheek, Manila grinning from ear to ear. Raja said goodbye to Raven, with a promise to meet up soon to chat more. Raven hugged Raja, but seemed to have her eye on a curvaceous woman dancing a few people away. Raja winked and Raven rolled her eyes, then sidled up over to the other woman. Naomi caught them both in a hug and Raja waved distant goodbyes at the few other folks she knew, finally leading Manila off the dance floor. They wove through the crowded club and waited in line briefly at the coat check. 

Sweaty and tired, Raja hailed a cab and they both got in the back seat. 

"Where to?" the driver asked.

"721 Gr-" began Raja.

"We're actually going to 1678 Berlin Street," interrupted Manila, shooting forward in her seat.

"Berlin Street it is," said the driver, pulling out into traffic.

Manila leaned back in the seat and Raja gave her a questioning look.

"You're coming home with me," said Manila, smiling coyly.

"How exciting," replied Raja, raising an eyebrow, "I haven't properly been to your place yet."

Raja had stood in Manila's doorway a few times, used her bathroom once and had picked her up outside her building on many occasions. However she'd never really been shown Manila's apartment.

"Yeah," Manila said, reaching her hand out to stroke Raja's thigh, "you're gonna get to see it."

"That's nice," purred Raja, leaning towards Manila and putting an arm around her. She glanced up to look at the driver, who he was keeping his eyes on the road. Manila was moving her hand further and further up Raja's leg, stroking her thigh. Raja was certainly enjoying being touched like this, and was getting more aroused than she liked to admit. Manila's hand was inching towards the crease where Raja's hip met her leg and Raja inhaled sharply, quickly taking Manila's wrist and moving her hand away. Manila looked disappointed until Raja leaned over to whisper in her ear, "Save it for your apartment."

Upon arrival Manila insisted she pay for the cab and Raja unfolded her long legs and uncomfortable heels, stepping out onto the pavement. Manila followed her and caught her up in a quick kiss before laughing and making a beeline for the door. Raja followed her. They approached Manila's apartment and she fumbled with her keys, laughed and managed to open the door. Raja walked in behind her, patiently taking off her shoes and waiting as Manila fumbled around with her jacket and boots and keys. 

"So, uh, d'you want the full tour?" asked Manila, giggling.

"Yeah, let's see!" replied Raja. 

"Um, yeah so," Manila brought Raja around the artificial wall enclosing the entrance area, "This is the living room," she gestured.

The room was a medium size, with a couple low bookshelves, coffee table, a futon couch and a squashy armchair. There was a small TV on top of a low book shelf and several potted plants of dubious health.

"It's not the most clean, uh," Manila began.

"Who's that?" Raja interrupted, pointing at the large poster on the wall. In the centre of the wall above the couch was a big poster, a portrait of an Asian woman, smiling. She was wearing a hockey jersey, clearly with the shoulder pads on underneath and holding a hockey stick up next to her. In the background was a a stylized silhouette of a hockey player, and a stars and stripes pattern.

"Oh that's Julie Chu!" said Manila excitedly, "Yeah she was like my hero, I guess it's a bit dumb…"

"No it's not," said Raja, smiling at her, "That's awesome and kind of hilarious, who is she?"

"She's the first Asian American woman to play professional hockey and represent the US at the Olympics," Manila said, "She's been to the Olympics four times and played pro for like, years, now she coaches varsity level in Montreal. She's also," Manila grinned and swayed a little, gesticulating excitedly, "a lesbian! She's married to another hockey player and has a kid and everything. She rocks. I wanted to be her when I was growing up."

Raja stared at Manila and grinned too, "Wow that's cool. She must've really been a role model for you, huh? Where did you get the poster?"

"Oh my god," Manila laughed, "My older brother Karl got it for me when I was going away to college, they weren't really selling posters of her so he like designed himself it and got it printed. Cause like he happened to be travelling to a city she was in and went to the game, tracked her down and got it signed. He told her it was for me and everything and she actually thought it was really cool apparently so… yeah, I keep it up for inspiration y'know?"

"Wow," said Raja, "That's hilarious. And awesome. And extra. Your brother must really care about you. Also it's cool to have heroes, I didn't really have any that were similar to me when I was growing up." She stepped up to Manila, took her face in her hands and gave her a kiss.

"Mmm, that's nice," sighed Manila, "Anyway, let me show you the rest of my apartment and then we can crash or whatever, I'm really tired."

She showed Raja the small kitchen which had a cute window, the bathroom Raja had seen before, a closet where her bag of hockey equipment was unceremoniously stuffed and her bedroom.

"Sorry it's messy," said Manila. She walked over to the bed and collapsed onto it, groaning contentedly.

Raja glanced around the room. There was a desk with a laptop and some art supplies, an overflow of clothes on the desk chair. There was a cork board on one wall with various photos and sketches pinned to it. Next to the bed was a small table with a stack of books, an alarm clock and a lamp.

Raja walked over and lay down next to Manila. Manila turned her head to face her and asked sleepily, "Is there anything you need?"

"No," replied Raja, yawning, "Just happy to be here with you."

"I have an extra toothbrush."

"That's great."

"Do you think your friends liked me?"

"Yeah, I think so."

"That's good. I'm really sleepy."

"Same, but we should definitely change before we crash," said Raja, pushing herself up onto one elbow and manoeuvring off the bed, "Ugh, I'll get some glasses of water."

She padded into the kitchen to locate cups and water, while Manila went into the bathroom and began to take off her limited makeup and brush her teeth. Raja joined her and they cleaned their faces and teeth in companionable silence.

"Do you have a shirt or something I can wear?" asked Raja. It had been a long time since she'd impulsively stayed the night at another persons apartment.

"Yeah, just a sec-" Manila opened a drawer and handed an oversized blue t-shirt to Raja. She held it out, it read 'St Cloud Bears: Ladies AAA Hockey 2013' with a snarling cartoon grizzly bear underneath. Raja laughed, it was a ridiculous shirt. She began to shed her own clothing, carefully folding and piling the items on Manila's desk and pulled the shirt on over her head. Manila was peeling the tight dress off and Raja admired her muscular back in the soft light of the lamp. Manila put on a t-shirt of her own and crawled into bed, Raja following her.

"Thanks for staying over, we can make an awesome breakfast tomorrow," said Manila. She rolled over and turned off the light, then cuddled in close to Raja.


	4. Family Potluck and Ensuing Shenanigans

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> After recovering from their night at the club Raja attends a dinner party with Manila's friends from the hockey league.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> this chapter took me a long time to figure out and it's a long one... enjoy! :)

Raja awoke hungover and grumpy to the bright morning sun shining through the window. Ugh, she thought to herself and rolled over to put her arm around Manila who… wasn't in bed. Raja lifted her head and peered around Manila's bedroom with one eye. She saw her clothes from the night before neatly folded on the desk where she'd left them, and reached for the glass of water on the nightstand, gulping it down. The sound of cooking drifted in from the kitchen. Raja grunted as she peeled back the comforter and slowly got out of bed, relieved to hear Manila's presence in the other room. Hesitant, she regarded her clothes from the night before. They'd be uncomfortable and kind of inappropriate for the morning. She hadn't planned on at staying over at Manila's and as a result didn't have anything other than what she'd worn to the club the night before. Hmmm, not ideal. She sighed and looked around quickly before opening a random drawer and finding a pair of dark blue sweatpants. They were a bit short on her but they'd do. 

Raja grabbed the glass of water and padded into the kitchen. Manila was happily banging around the kitchen, she had a couple of eggs frying while she took toast out of the toaster and put it on plates. 

"Morning," Raja greeted, and sat down on a chair at Manila's small table.

"Good morning!" Manila greeted with a big smile, spinning from the toast and plates back to the eggs, which she deftly flipped before turning back to the boiling kettle. She poured them both tea and brought the mug over to Raja.

"Thanks," Raja said and gratefully added some milk when Manila brought over the carton. Manila quickly finished cooking and brought them both plates of eggs, tomatoes, toast and her own tea. 

"Aw, thanks so much for making this," said Raja, quickly chowing down on her meal.

"No problem," replied Manila, cutting into her eggs, "I love breakfast and it's nice to be able to share."

They both ate in silence for a few minutes, the bright morning sun streaming in from the little kitchen window. 

"I like your place," said Raja, looking around at the kitchen and hallway, "it's cute and it seems really you, y'know?"

"Thanks!" said Manila, smiling, "It took me a while to afford a place without roommates but luckily I landed my current job and it pays the bills, even if the apartment is a bit outside the downtown core."

"Yeah it's not that far from most stuff though, and it's close to all the busses."

"And when there isn't like three feet of snow on the ground I bike everywhere," added Manila.

"I used to bike too when I was in my twenties," laughed Raja, "but then I got a car and moved and it changed things."

"You could always start again!"

"Yeah, I could ride around with you."

"You can ride around with me anytime," said Manila, raising her eyebrows.

Raja snorted, then took a big sip of her tea while Manila laughed at her own joke. Raja rose and took their plates to the counter, putting them in the dishwasher and doing her best to tidy a kitchen she was unfamiliar with. Who knows what goes where in someone else's home. But it's the thought that counts. Manila sat and relaxed, throwing out a few comments on storage and the state of her kitchen.

"Anyway, I really need to shower," said Manila, getting up off the chair.

"Yeah go for it," replied Raja, sitting back down, happy with her full belly and a second cup of tea.

Manila walked down the hall into the bathroom, Raja listened to her puttering around and the sound of the shower turning on. She finished her tea, walked back to the bedroom and sat on the bed, figuring she'd just wait until Manila was done. Then she had an idea.

Raja walked up to the bathroom, gently opened the door and slipped inside. The room was filling with warm steam and she could hear irregular splashing coming from the shower. Manila was humming gently. Raja slipped off her clothes and then stepped close the shower curtain.

"Hey Manila," she asked quietly, "Can I join you?"

She heard Manila make a surprised little noise, and then heard her say "Yeah," with a smile in her voice.

Raja stepped into the warm shower and basked in the glow of her gloriously naked girlfriend, thick dark hair piled up on her head and covered in shampoo. While she was still mildly hungover the warm water felt lovely and suddenly Raja couldn't wait to wash off the sweaty residue of the night before. She vaguely recalled someone had sloshed a drink down her top. 

"Mmmm, hello," murmured Manila, stepping close to Raja and running her hands over her hips, "I was hoping you'd join me."

"Oh really?" Raja raised an eyebrow, closed the distance between them and enjoyed the warm feeling of Manila's tummy pressed against her own. She wrapped an arm around Manila's shoulders, then leaned down to kiss her. Manila gripped Raja's hips tightly, short nails digging in causing Raja to gasp.

The following fifteen minutes were really, really nice.

000

After a most wonderful shower, they were dressing in Manila's room. Raja resignedly put her party clothes from the night before back on. She pulled the loose, dramatically styled pants on, looked at the shirt and sighed. While it was a sexy shirt, it exposed a lot of skin and wasn't really comfortable for the daytime. 

"Uh, Manila?" she asked.

"Yeah?" Manila was pulling a plain T-shirt over her head, paired with jeans.

"Can I borrow a shirt? This one's just not gonna cut it."

"Oh yeah, for sure!" Manila rooted around in her drawer and pulled out a white tank top and a plain blue button up, "Here ya go!"

"Great! Thanks," Raja smiled at her and pulled on the tank top, which Manila had been thinking ahead to provide given that Raja hadn't felt the need to wear a bra last night. She buttoned up the shirt and found it fit well-enough. Dressed, she sat on the bed and put on her socks, suddenly felt a twinge in her back and cursed under her breath. It must the effects of dancing so much the night before.

"Ugh, my back hurts," complained Raja, finished with her socks, "I'm not as young as I used to be."

"I'm feeling okay…" said Manila, turning to Raja, "A little sore, but much less hungover than when I first woke up. Breakfast and the shower helped. You're nothing but a withered old woman."

"Hey!" gasped Raja, "Rude!"

"I"m kidding!" Manila laughed, "You're like young at heart."

"Oh my god, you're such a brat."

Manila smiled and the flopped on the bed next to Raja. Raja hesitated and then reached out and rubbed small circles on Manila's back. In a way, non-sexual affection could be harder to get used to sometimes at the beginning of a relationship. Speaking of… they had been dating for a couple months, and Raja was starting to feel some attachment. Although they had differences in their lifestyles, she liked Manila and appreciated her quirks, athleticism and sense of humour. Perhaps they could explore a more serious relationship.

"Manila, I was thinking-"

The obnoxious ringing of Manila's phone interrupted her.

"Oh shit, that's my phone!" said Manila, and jumped up from the bed and swiped it off the desk, answering quickly, "Hello?"

A pause.

"Oh hey Alyssa! Yeah, I'm good…how are ya? … Oh I might need a ride, yeah. Uh, let me check-" 

Manila looked at Raja and quickly asked, "Um, could you give me a ride to practice later?" Raja nodded. Manila grinned and resumed her phone conversation.

"What? Yeah, that was her. Hey! Don't tease me! It's not- hey!" Manila laughed. Raja could vaguely hear laughter on the other end. "Anyway… Oh yeah? When? Friday? Uh huh. Yeah. Okay, for sure. Um, I dunno, I'll ask. Yeah. Yeah? Okay, great. I'll see you then... What? Oh frig off, that's not fair! Haha, yeah I'll bring potato salad. Okay. She'll be there? Awesome! Sure, I'll ask. Say hi to Vivi. I'll call Thursday to confirm. See ya, bye!"

Manila hung up and breathed a sigh. 

"Was that Alyssa?" asked Raja. 

"Yeah, she wanted to know if I needed a ride to practice later, and also," Manila paused, "She invited me to potluck at her house on Friday."

"That sounds like a good time," said Raja mildly.

"Would you, uh, like to come with me?" replied Manila.

"Sure!"

"Great! I don't think you need a to bring anything. I mean Alyssa just told me to ask you if you were interested, so…"

"Okay, well I'll see if I can pick something up beforehand, it's only Sunday now," replied Raja, getting up from the bed and giving Manila a quick hug, "It sounds like a fun evening."

"Yeah it should be good," said Manila, "Weren't you saying something right when she called?"

"It was nothing," said Raja, "Let's get a cab to my place, I really don't want to walk in these heels."

Once they were at Raja's they decided to bundle up and drive out of the city to go for a hike. It had warmed up, finally coming above zero for the first time in months. Raja thought it was just an anomaly, but Manila was determined that it meant spring was coming early. They had a lovely afternoon, even though there was a cold wind in the open areas. Then they rode back into town in time for Manila to get a snack and her gear before the ride over to practice. Raja didn't bring up the subject of furthering the relationship again, she seemed to have lost her nerve. She decided she'd leave it be for a little while and maybe bring it up later. If Manila didn't bring it up first.

The week proceeded regularly enough. Raja was busy at work, London Fashion Week was coming up and there was a lot of design, management and coordination to do. When Tuesday rolled around she went to see Manila's hockey game again, she sat with Alyssa and few other hangers on. Raja felt she had a slightly better grasp of it this time, and was following better and enjoying getting to know Alyssa better. She was quite a character. Raja kept an eye out for Acid, who had fouled against Manila in the previous game, but they were playing against a different team that week. 

000

When Raja rolled up to Manila's apartment on Friday at 7:30 she was ready. Raja had rushed home from work, picked up two bottles of wine and then quickly showered and changed into more casual clothes. With her limited time, she didn't put as much thought into her fashion choices as usual. But then again it was hard to decide what to wear to your girlfriend-but-we-haven't-really-said-it-yet's friend's potluck. All she knew for sure was that it was a hair down kind of night, so she let her silky salt-and-pepper locks flow freely. 

Manila was waiting for her on the steps of her building, humming with nervous energy that Raja could see from the car. It was a mild night but it was damp and foggy, making it feel much colder than it actually was. Manila rushed over to the car with a bowl of potato salad in her arms, and began talking a mile a minute as soon as she opened the door. Attempting to put on her seatbelt and give directions while also twisting to put her bowl in the backseat, Manila was a bit distracted. Raja took this calmly, and checked the address on her phone just in case before pulling away.

"-anyway, it was really ridiculous but the whole mineral water schtick is over like, thank god." Manila finished her workday anecdote with emphasis as Raja smirked and nodded.

"Yeah it sounds ridiculous."

"It totally was," Manila exhaled through her nose, leaning back into the seat, "I don't know why I'm so tense, sorry, I was feeling all keyed up before you got here. I'm pretty excited for tonight though!"

"Hey no worries," replied Raja, making a left turn, "You don't need to apologize. How do these potlucks normally go?" Raja was curious and a little nervous herself, she had very much left potluck days behind her, traded in for club nights. The last potluck she'd been to had been to a lesbian book club she'd joined in an attempt to get some friends outside the fashion industry. It hadn't really worked. 

"Oh they're pretty fun!" enthused Manila, "Alyssa is a really good cook and there's always a bunch of people there, like from the league and various others. She has dinners like once a month or so and cookouts in the summer or when there are birthdays and whatever. And occasionally other people host! But Alyssa loves hosting and like, obviously I couldn't really have everyone over in my little apartment, but y'know, someday I'd like to try or return the favour!"

"Sounds good," said Raja, "Do they usually go late?"

"Depends on the night!"

"Any ideas about tonight?" Raja was entertaining some ideas about what to do with Manila afterwards.

"No idea!" replied Manila brightly, "we'll find out when we get there."

They rolled up to the house soon after. It was on the edge of the city, down a quiet road with smaller older houses and large back yards. The houses on this street backed onto a small wooded area, hinting at the wilderness that began in a few kilometres. Much to Raja's surprise as they were still within city limits, and this neighbourhood was very unlike the cookie cutter suburb Raja had been picturing. Alyssa's place was painted light blue, and had a large wraparound porch, with a small front yard filled with icy melting snow. The gravel driveway was full, and other vehicles were parked on the shoulder in front of the house. Raja hesitantly parked on the shoulder.

They got out, and Manila hugged her potato salad with one arm, reaching out to hold Raja's hand with the other. Raja smiled and they proceeded down the driveway. She didn't know anyone who lived outside the main downtown area of the city, and if she did it was rare that she'd visit. This was a bit out of her comfort zone. She eyed the icy snow, and the malformed snowman in the middle of the yard. No need to be judgemental before you even go in, she reminded herself. Manila let them into the porch and they added their boots to the pile of others. Manila opened the door and light and chatter spilled out. 

"Can you hold this for a sec?" Manila asked Raja and quickly handed her the bowl. 

Raja took advantage of the moment to admire Manila's outfit as she took off her coat. She was wearing nicely fitted high-waisted jeans that pleasantly showed off her strong thighs, and a tank top with a short-sleeved button-up loosely over it. The button-up was mustard yellow, with a tiny pineapple pattern on it. It was a look that sat pleasantly between masculine and feminine, and Raja was enjoying it.

"Nice shirt," she commented, passing the bowl back to Manila and removing her coat.

"Aw thanks," smiled Manila.

"Hey there, c'mon in!" someone greeted loudly and Raja looked up, startled. Alyssa had seemingly appeared from nowhere.

"Hey Alyssa," greeted Manila, giving her a hug, "I brought Raja! And potato salad!"

"That's great," grinned Alyssa, "Hey there Miss Rah-ja nice to see you again."

"Hello!" Raja greeted Alyssa somewhat awkwardly, still trying to find a place for her coat.

"Oh just hand me your coat honey, I'll throw it on the bed," said Alyssa, and Raja handed it to her, "You two make yourselves at home, folks have started eating, we're all out in the living room!"

"Certainly, thank you for inviting me," said Raja. Alyssa was wearing a shimmery pink top with comfortable-looking blue jeans underneath. Fairly casual, from Raja's eye. However, her hair was done up and blown out and it stood tall. Alyssa left to deposit Raja's coat in another room. Manila led Raja in through the hallway to the kitchen, which was an old fashioned room with a long table running down the middle. There were windows with curtains on the far end. The right wall of the kitchen opened onto the living room. Manila rushed ahead, depositing her potato salad on the heavily laden table to greet her friends. 

Raja hesitated, pausing and looking over the table and the room. There were a few people she recognized from the hockey games and many she didn't know, and she looked around for an open spot to deposit the wine she'd brought. 

A hand landed on her shoulder, and she jumped.

"Alright Miss Raja, welcome!" announced Alyssa into Raja's ear, gesturing towards the full table, "Here we've got everything you could possibly wish for in the way of food. We've got pork shoulder and rolls, made that myself. We've got lasagna, we've got chickpea curry that's vegan, we've got beans and rice, we've got Manila's lovely potato salad, we've got coleslaw, we've got spinach and goat cheese salad, we've got pasta salad, we've got quinoa salad, chips and dip and last but not least we've got cupcakes made by Vivi and Laganja!" 

"Wow," commented Raja, "That's a selection."

"Sure as heck it is darlin,' I absolutely love potlucks y'know, everybody brings one thing and then you get a table full," said Alyssa, sashaying over the counter and getting a paper plate and a fork for Raja, "If that isn't true democracy I don't know what is."

"Uh, yeah?" agreed Raja, moving towards and table and taking a generous helping of lasagna and various salads.

"Oh you brought wine!" exclaimed Alyssa, noticing Raja's bottles on the counter, "Wonderful, I'll definitely be getting into this later - oh, would you like anything to drink? There's beer in the fridge and a good old liquor cabinet in the living room if that's more to your liking!" Alyssa winked.

"I wouldn't be upset about a glass of wine," said Raja, winking back at her.

"Most certainly," grinned Alyssa deviously, opening a drawer looking for the wine cork. Raja chuckled as Alyssa struggled dramatically with the cork, but finally got it open and poured Raja a generous glass of red. 

"Here ya go darling," said Alyssa, "Now let me introduce you to everyone! Hey Kasha!"

The woman identified as Kasha turned, she was in the kitchen, taking a beer out of the fridge. She was in her early fifties, with short stylish grey hair. 

"Hey yourself Alyssa," she said, "You managed to wrangle someone new into this evening of debauchery?"

"Aw, debauchery as if," Alyssa gasped, scandalized, "This is a family friendly event! I just wanted to introduce you to Miss Raja, she's here with Manila."

"Ah, Raja, hello," said Kasha, offering a hand, "I'm Mrs Kasha Davis."

Raja smoothly put down her wine and they shook hands, "Hi, yeah I'm here with Manila."

"Our best forward!" Kasha laughed, "I'm on the team with her, I play defence and I've got to say those young ones keep me on my toes!"

"Mmm yeah," replied Raja, "I saw the game this week, looked like you all were doing well."

"Yeah, it was a good match, the team's looking strong this season we might win the championship," said Kasha, "Oh, allow me to introduce you to my wife, Tempest."

A woman as tall as Raja had appeared in the doorway, she sported mid-length auburn hair with streaks of grey, also looking to be in her fifties. 

"Tempest, meet Raja, Raja meet Tempest," said Kasha, with Alyssa nodding in approval from where she was occupied with putting out a small fire behind them (metaphorically of course.) Raja learned that Tempest and Kasha had both grow up the the city and had both played on the hockey team for 25 years.

"-it's kept us in shape, even if it's a round shape," joked Kasha, causing Tempest to burst out laughing.

"It was great to meet you two!" said Raja, and moved towards the other room. She wanted to track down Manila. Taking another bite of the delicious food on her plate and hoping to find a seat, she turned into the living room. It was spacious with various old couches and comfortable chairs pulled up, 70s style funk music playing and as many people standing as sitting. There was a large carpet at the far end of the room near the door to the back deck, where Manila was currently lying on her back being sat on by Vivienne and an unidentified child. They were all shrieking with laughter, including the green-haired Laganja, who was on her knees doubled over as another younger child attempted to climb on her shoulders. Raja snorted a laugh at this situation, and quickly snagged a seat on a couch nearby as somebody else got up. More hungry than she realized she was, she began to eat quickly, while observing Manila's antics. 

"I wanna play pirates!" said Vivienne, briefly getting up to let Manila catch her breath. 

"Oh my god, pirates?" asked Manila, and the other child sitting on her legs nodded emphatically, "Okay, well if we're gonna play pirates, that means we're gonna need…!" Manila rolled over and reached out to tug at a standing woman's loose pant leg, "…the pirate queen!"

"Oh hell no," said the woman, who had noticed Manila on the ground and turned around, putting on some kind of pirate character, "Not you, not this frightening wench from the briny depths!"

Raja recognized Shangela from the hockey match, although this time she had her hair in cornrows, she was rocking a distinctly masculine look; high-waisted loose black jeans with a plain white t-shirt tucked in. She barred her teeth in a huge grin and dramatically gestured down at Manila. This was clearly a game they had all played before.

"Briny depths!" shrieked the child still hugging Manila around the knees, and this statement was echoed by the other two children present. 

"I'm nought but a mermaid," mock-cried Manila, "what ever have I done to you, pirate queen?"

"She stole all your treasure!" shrieked Vivienne. 

"Yeah and your girlfriend too," added Laganja, smirking. 

"Your princess girlfriend!" shouted the child still attached to Laganja, who had her hair up in two incredibly cute round puffs.

Raja was grinning and sipping her wine, she couldn't wait to see how this played out. Best of all, Manila hadn't noticed that she was watching yet.

"Ah yes," said Shangela, crouching down, "This evil mermaid stole my beautiful princess girlfriend! And what did she do with her?"

"She turned her into a fish!" yelled Vivienne, "Now we have to get revenge!" She laughed maniacally and climbed up onto Shangela who stood up and held her piggy back style. Vivienne laughed and kicked her feet. 

"Cyclone attack, cyclone attack!" chanted Vivienne, clearly ready for battle.

The other child had finally let go of Manila, and had snuck over to Laganja and the third child. Manila made a frightening gurgling noise and stood up, keeping her legs together and undulating her body as though she had a mermaid tail. Raja was tempted to get her phone out and take a video. 

"I'm gonna keep your fishy girlfriend," growled Manila, "And all your treasure too!"

Laganja and the other two kids cowered in mock fear behind Manila and cried, "Save us!"

"Cyclone attack!" roared Vivienne, and Shangela started to spin around, Vivienne clutching onto her shoulders for dear life and screaming with excitement. Much to Raja's surprise, after three turns, Vivienne launched herself off Shangela's back towards Manila. Laganja and the other kids let out surprised gasps. However, Manila was ready for it, having moved out of her mermaid posture to plant her feet solidly. She caught Vivienne and in one swift movement, put her down and threw herself to the floor dramatically, allowing Vivienne to fall on top of her. They wrestled and Laganja and the other two kids joined in, shouting dramatic war cries. Raja found the entire thing to be wholesome, if a bit chaotic. She rarely spent time around kids.

The smallest child ended up getting Vivienne's elbow to the face, and she started crying. A tall dark-skinned man who was clearly her parent swooped in and picked her up.

"Ah, sorry about that Bob, playing pirates got too wild," apologized Manila.

"No worries," he said to Manila and comforted the child, "Hey Dida, baby you're okay!"

The small kid, now identified as Dida, calmed down and Vivienne apologized to her. Shangela, Laganja and the blond child stood up. Laganja suggested something more low-key like a board game, and everyone agreed. Manila excused herself, and started looking around. Raja waited, sipping her wine until Manila's eyes landed on hers. 

"Oh my god," exclaimed Manila, "Were you watching the whole time?"

"Indeed I was…" said Raja.

"Ahhh…" Manila breathed, clearly a little embarrassed, "Well, uh, that's family potluck for ya, everyone was already playing so I just joined in…"

"Don't be embarrassed," laughed Raja, "That was cute and hilarious! Come sit with me."

Manila sat down on the couch.

"So, I take it 'pirates' is a pretty regular game?" teased Raja.

"Haha! Yeah, it's Vivi's favourite," said Manila, "Did you see her jump from Shangela to me? We've been practicing that move since the fall."

"Yeah, I definitely thought someone was going to get hurt."

"Believe me, it took a lot of falling over to get it right!"

"I met Kasha and Tempest," said Raja, changing the subject.

"Oh yeah? They're great!"

"They seemed like a classic lesbian married couple."

"Pretty much! Except like, with a double dose of hockey."

"Yeah, that's more unusual," Raja chuckled and looked around the room, "So, do you know everybody here?"

"Yeah," replied Manila, "It's mostly people from the team, and-" she paused, suddenly exclaiming, "Oh shit! I totally just left you alone while I rolled around on the floor with three kids for like twenty minutes didn't I? I haven't even introduced you to anyone! Oh my god…"

Raja laughed as Manila bent over, covering her face in embarrassment, groaning, "You're not mad, are you?"

"No, I'm not mad," said Raja, patting Manila's back. 

"Urgghhh… Okay, I'll make sure I introduce you to people..." replied Manila, "I actually haven't eaten yet, so I'm gonna get a plate real quick!"

"Sounds good."

Manila stood up and went to the kitchen. Raja waited and observed the party. Much like the demographics at the arena, it was a mostly queer crowd, with a mix of ages and ethnicities. There were more children than she'd anticipated, but they seemed relatively contained in a small group. 

Manila returned to her with a plate piled high. 

"Oh my god I'm so hungry," she said, biting into a pulled pork and coleslaw sandwich.

"I had the lasagna, it was great," Raja commented mildly, observing that a fourth child had joined Vivienne's contingent in the corner, "So how do you know Alyssa? You seem pretty close with her family."

"Enhf- ugh," replied Manila, mouth full. She chewed and swallowed, saying, "Me and Laganja joined the hockey team at the same time, like after I moved to the city when I finished college. We became pals quick cause we were both new and uh, I didn't really know anyone. Alyssa, well I guess she could tell I was lonely, so she invited me to these potlucks and I met more people. She also helped me move a couple times, she gives me rides whenever she can. We go to the Costco out in the suburbs sometimes, she's basically my second mom."

"Wow," said Raja, impressed, "That's so great, it's really kind of her."

"Yeah, haha," said Manila, "I guess she just likes me, and I'm Laganja's friend so, yeah. I helped her out with her skills actually, we would have extra practice together sometimes. She doesn't seem like the type, but I think she was a bit intimidated when she joined the league, she's still in high school."

"I mean yeah it can be hard when you first come out," commented Raja, "I didn't really have anyone to turn to, but I did manage to find a community in the city. I was room mates with Raven for a couple years, and those were wild times."

"Woah, Raven? Really? She's so scary!"

"To you maybe! She's an intense person and she cares a lot."

"Sounds like Alyssa."

"Yeah a little, but very different styles."

"Totally."

Manila was finishing the last of her food, "Okay, so uh, do you want me to introduce you to everyone?"

"Oh yes!" Raja drained her wine.

They got up off the couch and moved through the crowd, Manila pulling people aside and introducing them. Raja distinctly noticed that Manila didn't refer to her as her 'girlfriend.' Rather she was just introducing her and letting people assume that they were here as partners. Or friends. Or whatever it was they were assuming. Mildly annoyed, Raja decided to make it clear to people who exactly she was to Manila. As they met folks, Raja put her hand on Manila's lower back, around her shoulders, or held her hand. Manila didn't seem to notice this too much, responding happily to the physical attention. It was clear she was comfortable here, and Raja was happy to see it.

000

"Hey Shangela!" 

"Oh hey what's up?" Shangela turned to face Manila and Raja.

"Uh, have I introduced you to Raja yet?" asked Manila.

"This the new woman you're dating?" asked Shangela, flashing Raja smirk.

"Uh yeah, we've been seeing each other," replied Manila, rubbing the back of her neck.

"Yeah, hi I'm Raja," stated Raja, offering Shangela to shake her hand. Shangela shook it, an eyebrow raised. Raja squeezed a little tighter than usual. Raja could tell Shangela had a lot of attitude, but she and Manila were clearly friends. 

"I've heard a lot about you," said Shangela, "Manila was getting all embarrassed talking about you in the locker room."

"No I wasn't!" gasped Manila.

Raja raised an eyebrow.

"Girl you were," continued Shangela, teasing Manila, "She was going on about this lady she was seeing and how she was like tall and older and hot as hell! And we were all like damn, Manila's scoring! Or she's telling us some bullshit!"

Raja put an arm around Manila, who was covering her face in embarrassment and laughing, "So, do you believe her now?"

Shangela laughed loudly and clapped her hands, "Here you are in the flesh, and I gotta say, her descriptions were accurate." Shangela winked exaggeratedly at Raja, who laughed and rolled her eyes.

"Shangie…" Manila groaned, "Why are you like this…?"

"You love it!" teased Shangela, "Anyway, don't even worry babe, I can tell Raja's cool, and we're all real happy for you seeing someone new since the bullshit last year."

"Thanks girl," Manila said quickly, "You've been there for me."

"So uh, how long have you known each other?" asked Raja.

"Since Manila moved to the city," replied Shangela, "Like three years?"

"Cool, Shangela what do you do for work?"

"I'm a camera tech for a local film company, Manila and I actually went to the same college but didn't become close until-"

The small talk continued for a while, and the two of them moved on to other folks, making their way around the room until Raja had been introduced to just about everyone. She was surprised by how many people were familiar with Manila and the strength of this tight-knit athletic community. Someone put on an 80s dance jam and the room let out a cheer, apparently this was a tune people were familiar with. Drink in hand, Alyssa sashayed into the middle of the room and began to dance wildly. 

This was not the kind of environment Raja usually danced in. Her extended friend group didn't tend to do gatherings like this. Dinners with her family had been somewhat tense affairs in the past few years. But she had memories of larger extended family gatherings in her childhood in Indonesia, of running around with cousins and outdoor tables full of colourful food. 

Alyssa beckoned at Manila, who immediately moved out onto the carpet to join her, dancing hard and obnoxiously as they all sang the chorus. Shangela joined in, clapping her hands, as well as a few others.

Raja chose this moment to escape to the kitchen and pour herself another glass of wine.

When she returned the song was fading out and everyone was moving out of the impromptu dance floor back into their little conversations, Raja snuck up to Manila and wrapped an arm around her waist, pulling her in close.

"Hey babe," she said into her ear.

"Oh hey," she whispered back.

"You know you look good tonight."

"Aw, thanks!"

Manila leaned into Raja's shoulder, then straightened and asked quickly, "Hey, do you like kids?"

"Uh-" replied Raja, caught off guard.

"I was thinking about earlier, when I was playing with Vivi and her friends," said Manila, "You were just watching and like, I don't know."

"Well, I," began Raja, "I -uh, I haven't thought about it much. I barely ever interact with children. My cousins have kids but I haven't seen them since I was a teenager. It's not like I work at a daycare or something. God, imagine." Raja took a sip of her wine.

Manila was giving her an odd look, and Raja felt defensive. 

"It's not that I don't like them!" she insisted, "I really just never see them. None of my friends have any."

"Sorry, I was just wondering," said Manila, "I guess I babysit Vivi and Dida sometimes, so I get along with them pretty well. I mean I grew up in a big family, it's a normal thing for me. I guess I'm kind of a big kid myself." She laughed softly.

"Yeah, that's for sure," Raja nodded, glad they were in safer territory, "I didn't think you hanging out with the kids was weird or anything, just like, I don't really get it. Like why you'd want to."

The odd look was back on Manila's face again, "Well okay. No worries I guess."

Damn it, Raja had messed up somewhere in this conversation.

Manila shook herself and then a smile returned to her face, "Let's go get cupcakes!"

000

The rest of the night passed smoothly, and soon enough people began to leave. Coats and scarves were gathered and children were wrangled out the door. Alyssa and Raja were on the couch, Alyssa guffawing loudly at something Raja had said. Raja was a few glasses of wine in, and Alyssa was just about three sheets to the wind. Manila was sprawled on the floor talking to Laganja. Vivienne was rolling around next to her them, giggling hysterically at a story Laganja was telling.

"So, Miss Rah-ja," drawled Alyssa, moving closer to her on the couch, "Why don't you go ahead and tell me how you met Miss Manila?"  
Raja laughed at Alyssa's conspiratorial tone, "She hasn't told you? Really?"

"Miss Manila is private about her personal relationships," replied Alyssa, "She just mentioned she had started seeing someone and while she does talk a lot about you and her's activities together, she has been thrifty with the details."

"Well we met on a dating app actually," said Raja conspiratorially, "I know it's not the most romantic-" Alyssa had made a face- "but we hit it off. Y'know, awkward coffee date the whole shebang, trying to be charming with some random from the internet. But it seems to have worked out pretty well!"

"Alright, alright," said Alyssa, raising an eyebrow, "well that's one mystery solved."

"Mhmm," Raja crossed her legs, and threw her hair over one shoulder, "Well I guess we should get going soon, Manila's gonna have to drive us home again…"

"Wait, wait one second," said Alyssa, manoeuvring herself off the couch. Then she hesitated and turned saying in a low voice, "Now I don't want to assume anything but you strike me as a woman who enjoys herself a good blunt every now and again…"

Raja's draw dropped. 

"Uh, yeah. Yes." She said emphatically.

"You just wait right there then…" Alyssa hurried out of the living room.

Raja was surprised and more than a little curious what on earth Alyssa could be bringing her. She amused herself by watching Manila and Laganja giggle together, Laganja talking about something that had happened to her at school recently. As Manila nodded empathetically and asked questions, she could see the strong friendship between them. 

Alyssa returned and sat down on the couch next to Raja. 

"Okay Miss Thing, I've got something good for ya," she grinned, holding out two little jars with greenish blue nubs in the them, "These are from our homegrown supply, they're both CBD dominant so they're real calming. This one's a good old grandaddy purple," The jar was placed into Raja's hands and she examined it greedily, "and this other one is ACDC, both are very relaxing and focusing."

"Oh wow," said Raja, feeling thrilled, "This is wonderful! Do you grow it yourself?"

"Yes we do ma'am," Alyssa replied proudly, "Got our medical license not two years ago, I've got 'em with lights in the basement in the winter, and out in the back yard in the summer! I've always had a couple plants on the side before we were licensed though." Alyssa winked, "It's a real rewarding hobby."

"Yeah," nodded Raja, "I hear you. This is lovely, I've always enjoyed it but it's been a while since I've had any that's been good!"

"It's best when it comes from friends," said Alyssa.

"Well thank you very much Alyssa," said Raja. Wow, she was definitely drunk, gushing over weed with Alyssa… "I'll let you know how it is. I think it's time for us to head out though. Hey Manila, are you ready to go?"

Manila looked up form her conversation with Laganja, "Yeah, I'm good!"

"Okay great," Raja rolled off the couch and stretched, "Argh! Thanks so much for having us Alyssa and also for this wonderful gift…"

"You're very welcome," replied Alyssa happily, getting up and giving Raja an unexpected hug, "I take it I'll see you at this weeks game?"

"Yeah looks like it," smiled Raja. 

Manila said her goodbye to Laganja, Vivienne and Alyssa, and they made their way to the front door, Raja finding her coat tossed on Alyssa's bed. At the last minute 

Manila remembered her potato salad bowl, and rushed to the kitchen. Luckily, some guest had decided to take on the cleanup, so it was sitting on the counter already clean.

They made their way out of the house, holding hands up the driveway. 

"So uh," said Raja, "I think you'll have to drive again…"

"No worries!" said Manila happily, "I don't usually drink at family potluck, I've had to drive other people home before!"

"Well aren't you lucky tonight," teased Raja, handing her the keys. 

They got in the car and made their way home smoothly, Manila confident in the drivers seat. Raja felt the gentle hum of the car lulling her into a relaxed state and, to her later embarrassment, fell asleep before they got home.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> thanks for reading!!! I had fun describing Alyssa's home and all the food... and her medically-licensed home grow-op lol
> 
>  
> 
> .... there's some serious drama coming in the next chapter o_O ... stay tuned!


	5. Injury

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Raja attends another hockey game, and things go south very quickly.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Okay the last chapter wasn't my best, but i think this one's pretty good… and it actually advances the plot lol. thank you for your continued interest, o mysterious readers!  
> so I uh…. self-indulgently describe a lot of ice hockey scenes here… enjoy?
> 
> ***trigger warning in this chapter: sports-related head injury, broken nose, bleeding nose

After the potluck on Friday, Raja and Manila had spent Saturday together running errands. Sunday they had things to do around their respective apartments, as well as Manila's hockey practice. Raja rolled into work on Monday ready to go with a focused anticipation. It was the first day of London Fashion week and such things reverberated throughout the industry, even as far away as Canada. This week she'd be working much more closely with Raven than usual, and it was bound to be a good time.

Monday evening came with a volley of texts from Manila, who had run into an unexpected issue with her helmet that had involved rushing to the sports equipment store. They weren't able to fix it for the next day so she had resignedly decided to borrow a backup helmet from Kasha for the match. Raja really wasn't informed enough on this matter to have an opinion, so she just enjoyed the entertainment that Manila's frequent and melodramatic updates were providing.

The fact that they still hadn't discussed their relationship status was floating in the back of Raja's mind.

Tuesday evening arrived suddenly, and Raja remembered she had promised to go to Manila's hockey game this week. That wasn't a big deal, and it was nice to be distracted from work for at least one evening rather than working overtime. Conveniently, Alyssa had volunteered to drive Manila to the game tonight so Raja would be meeting them there.

Once she had arrived home from work she'd thrown on a decent pair of jeans and a fitted black shirt with a thin sweater underneath and a casual blazer. Slipping her trusted brown leather jacket overtop, she left her apartment.

000

Raja drove up to the arena and parked in what had become her usual spot. There were small groups of people smoking and chatting outside the arena. Pushing open the doors, she walked up the stairs to the top of seats, and immediately went to the concession stand to buy fries for Alyssa and a beer for herself.  
Alyssa was in her usual spot, the one she claimed had the best view. Raja hadn't bothered trying to watch the game from another section yet, so she hadn't determined if this was true or not. She waved to the few people she recognized from the potluck and from the last couple games as she made her way down the concrete steps to sit with Alyssa. Alyssa as always was wearing her bright blue coat. 

"Hey there Miss Raja," greeted Alyssa with a grin, "Heard you were really busy, Miss Manila wasn't sure if you were going to make it tonight."

"Ah, that was never in question," replied Raja, settling in and handing Alyssa the plate of fries, "Yeah it's London Fashion Week so things are crazy at work, and I did stay late today. But I decided this would be a nice way to relax."

"Well, we're real glad to see you," said Alyssa, "Nothing quite like watching the game live. I never played myself but Laganja absolutely loves it and I've become one heck of a hockey mom."

They chatted back and forth for another couple minutes until the little organ tune sang out and the players streamed onto the ice to warm up. Raja noticed that they were playing against the same team as they had at her first game, Snowstorm. Interesting. The last time, Manila's team (Mussels) had won against them. Frankly, Raja couldn't wait to see the other team have their asses handed to them a second time by Manila, Laganja, Shangela and the rest of the crew. Perhaps this whole venture was bringing out her competitive side…

"Hello hello hello! This is your host Rick Richardson and thanks to everyone for 'coming out' tonight to the East Coast Rainbow LGBT Hockey League! On this wonderful Tuesday we have Mussels vs Snowstorm, the late-season rematch before we head into the playoffs in three weeks time! Let me tell ya these ladies are powerful, vicious, high level athletes with the utmost sense of honour and sportsmanship! But given this rivalry we can expect blood on the ice tonight-"

Raja made a face, had she heard that correctly? Raja and Alyssa looked at each other.

At the same time someone further down in the stands yelled "Shut the fuck up, Rick!"

"-metaphorically of course folks! Metaphorically! We all expect a good clean game. Hahaha… anyway tonight's match is brought to you by…"

Raja watched Manila skating in little figure eights, as she usually did before the puck drop. Her helmet was different, Raja noticed, it didn't have the cage all around the face the way hers usually did, instead it had a plastic visor across the top half, just like the one Kasha wore. This must be the backup helmet Manila was texting her about the night before. The announcements wrapped up quickly and the face-off began. 

Manila slapped the puck sideways to Laganja on the left wing. Laganja received it smoothly and took off, skating around the other team's forward and towards the goal. Manila skated up and flanked her, with Renae on the right side. 

"-and that's a strong opening, Edwards flying up the ice, passing back to Luzon-" the announcer's voice boomed over the arena. 

Laganja was streaking in towards the goal, blocked by the opposing team's defence. Manila had the puck, made a loop around Winters, pulled back and took a powerful slapshot. It deflected off Laganja and went in just over the goalie's glove. The crowd let out a big cheer and the goal buzzer rang out. Manila skated back up to the bench, pumping her fist in the air.

"-a strong opener by Luzon, deflected off Edwards! Goal in the first five minutes of play, that's quite unusual folks! Luzon's been having an excellent season, in terms of points she's-"

Raja cheered and clapped, feeling proud. Alyssa gave her a hi-five, adding, "Look at these girls working together! Unstoppable!"

The lines switched and they set up another face off. The opposing team's goalie seemed angry, she was slapping her giant leg pads with her stick, making a loud noise.

"Oho, Miss Kameron over there is not having it," commented Alyssa, "I think this match is going to be a good one."

The energy in the arena seemed more intense than usual, Raja had noticed. Maybe it was just that more people were drinking. It was hard to say.

"-that's McMichaels with the puck, passing to - intercepted by Betty!"

The tall player for the opposing team (now identified as Acid Betty, the one who'd blindsided Manila in the game a few weeks earlier) dove in and and intercepted the pass, powering up the ice, handling the puck with confidence and ease. Raja sat up straight and watched her suspiciously. Anybody so much as looked at Manila the wrong way deserved suspicion, in her opinion. 

A defensive player from Manila's team, Mattel, engaged her, but Acid quickly dodged around her and passed to the player on her left, one C. Michaels. C. Michaels came up beside the net and passed back across to Acid, who wound up and slapped the puck at the net. It flew high and wide, the Mussel's goalie reaching out and then pulling back, unconcerned. It was hard shot though, and the crash against the glass reverberated around the arena and sent 'oohs' up from the crowd. The puck dropped down behind the net and was quickly picked up by Renae, who brought it around close to the boards and up the right side of the rink. 

Well, Raja begrudgingly admitted, this Acid character was talented.

"-and that's the puck up the right side, we've got Snowstorm switching lines as their defence comes up against the dynamic passing duo Washington and McMichaels-"

Alyssa was providing Raja with her own personal commentary to add to that of the announcer. 

"See Renae there, how she's pausing and pulling back and circling, making strategic passes? That's her talent, she doesn't get involved in the melees, she doesn't take too many shots and she doesn't sprint up the ice like she's out to raise hell the way Manila and Laganja do," said Alyssa to Raja, "But she sets up opportunities for the other players."

Renae, McMichaels and the third forward had made a strategic triangle coming up the ice to the other end of the rink, passing quickly back and forth. Much to the frustration of the defence, who retreated closer and closer to the goal, and to Acid who was lunging back and forth between them, desperately trying to knock the puck out of their possession. McMichaels made a shot on goal and their goalie stopped it, resetting the game.

"Huh, I see that," said Raja, sipping her beer, "It's a different strategy."

"Yeah, this might look like a sport where a bunch of people push and shove on a slippery surface," smiled Alyssa, "but if you want to win it requires some brains." 

The first period came to an end, and Raja sipped her beer and checked her phone while the players took a break and discussed strategy. She had a slough of texts from Raven and various others, and work emails. Sighing, she ignored the work emails and texted Raven back, saying she was at the hockey match. Raven responded with simultaneously laughing and crying emojis. 

"Aaaaand we're back folks!" said out the announcer, and the little organ tune rang out again, the players filing back onto the ice, "Luzon facing off against Needles this time, the blonde menace is back in town!"

There was laughter from the audience and scoffing and eye rolling from Alyssa.

"Damn, Rick's just begging to have Sharon chew him out when this is done," said Alyssa, "Oh, there they go!"

Once again Manila had won the face-off and sent the puck backwards to Shangela, who circled around and passed it to someone who's jersey said Sofia. Sofia skated up across the halfway line before passing it to Manila. Manila rocketed down the ice with the puck. Raja let out a cheer.

Defender Leblanc skated backwards hard, keeping with Manila, slicing her stick across the ice horizontally. Manila lost control of the puck and it bounced off the boards, immediately picked up by O'Hara of the Snowstorm, who cut away from them and around the back of the net. Manila skated across the ice making for Needles in the centre, whom O'Hara had passed up to. Shangela engaged Needles, and she skidded to a stop against the boards, the two of them jostling for the puck. Manila pulled up, waiting for a pass. Shangela, despite being much shorter than Needles, threw an elbow at her chest and scooped the puck out from between her skate and the boards and... the whistle was blown for a penalty.

"Shangie!" shouted Alyssa, "You deserved that!"

Shangela was grinning and raised her gloves in a big shrug, gesturing to the crowd as she skated over to the penalty box. The crowd was booing, cheering and laughing in equal measure. Needles was unhurt, skating haughtily back to the centre.

"-and that's a power play for Snowstorm after a bit of indulgent elbowing by Wadley…" boomed the announcer.

Alyssa leaned over to Raja, "Okay, so a power play is when there's a player in the penalty box right, and so whoever's team did the foul that player stays in the box for two minutes and they have to continue with only four players on the ice. Until the time is up, and then you know Shangela's coming back with a vengeance."

Raja nodded, "Makes sense, thanks!"

She took a quick count of who remained on the ice from Manila's team. It would be Manila, Laganja, the other winger Sofia, and Kasha as defence.

The power play began with another face-off in the Mussel's end, with Manila up against Needles again. Needles won and cleared the puck to O'Hara. Since Manila's team only had four they were employing a defensive strategy, Kasha placing herself in front of the net just outside the goalie crease, and fending off any Snowstorm players that got too close. Sofia was skating back and forth with wild energy between the members of the opposing team as they passed and fended her off. Laganja was sticking to C. Michaels, whom she had clearly labelled the biggest threat and was just generally getting in her way. Manila was hovering close to the net as well, waiting for a lazy pass or a mishandled puck to clear it out of their end. 

Her opportunity came when O'Hara attempted a shot on goal. It rebounded off the goalie's pads, sending the loose puck over to C. Michaels who was hampered by Laganja and couldn't get control of it. Manila swooped in and seized it, flying up the ice in total control.

"-there goes Luzon! She's alone at centre ice! Snowstorm left their players close to the net hoping for that scoring opportunity but oh no, she's alone, she's going alone!"

Winters was skating hard to try to catch up with Manila, but she was faster and bore down on the goalie. Alyssa leapt up in her seat and cheered. Caught up in the moment, Raja stood up too, biting her lip with anticipation. K. Michaels squared up, coiled and ready to spring. Manila looped wide and took a wrist shot to the top corner - which was stopped by K. Michaels' snake-like reflexes, puck safely in her glove. The crowd let out sighs and cheers. Raja laughed a little to herself and sat down.

The power play continued, with the puck having been shot back down to Manila's team's end. The puck was patiently passed back and forth between the defeners, then a big shot by Needles was made to the middle, where at least five people were in front of the net. In the ensuing chaos it rebounded and O'Hara got it, slapping it towards Kasha who was pushed up against C.Michaels in front of the goalie. Laganja got control of it and brought it around the back of the net only to be intercepted by Needles who chipped a shot at the corner. The goalie dove for it, but the puck went in. The buzzer sounded.

"-a sneaky goal there for Snowstorm, with some quick-thinking by Needles," said the commentator.

The penalty ended and Shangela returned, accurately as Alyssa had described, with a vengeance.

000

After several more shots on goal and Laganja memorably tripping in front of the net at top speed and sliding right into K.Michaels who fell on top of her, they arrived at the end of the second period. Raja was getting another drink at the concession stand, and eavesdropping on the flirtatious couple in front of her. She moseyed back down to Alyssa, drink in hand. Although she still wasn't sure about all the rules (what the hell is offside) Raja was having a pretty good time. Not to mention that Manila was one heck of a powerhouse and getting to see her perform the game she enjoyed best was exciting and satisfying. Raja thought she could get used to this.

The third period began after the announcer had finished playing Are You Gonna Be My Girl by Jet twice for some unknown reason. It started quickly, with Renae taking the face-off and sending the puck to McMichaels.

"-McMichaels back to Washington, and they're going forward… ooh! Stolen by Winters who clears it up to the red line, there's Wadley taking it again, passes to Mattel. Mattel to McMichaels. And they're against the boards that's Winters again, bringing it back to the Mussels end. She passes it to Needles. O'Hara. Pushes past Davis, shoots! A lovely save by Andrews in goal-"

The Mussels were back in possession but hung back, Shangela passing it back and forth with Mattel while the forward lines for both teams changed over. Raja smiled seeing Manila not bother with the little gate and jumping over the boards, careening off towards the puck. There was clear energy and excitement in her body language. Shangela passed it to Laganja. Laganja skated up the left side of the rink, flanked by the opposing team's offence. Laganja attempted to bounce the puck off the boards around the defence and it went wide. It was picked up by Acid, who looped around to centre ice. The crowd was restless, cheering hard and yelling friendly obscenities at players on both sides.

"-there it goes with Betty in possession, she's barrelling up the ice, she's over the centre line!"

Raja was feeling pretty comfortable, she leaned back in her seat. There were only ten minutes left on the clock and both teams were pushing hard to score to even out the tie game. The joyful tension of competition was palpable.

"-Wadley's come up. Betty dodges, passing to Needles, back to Betty. She's into the boards, fighting for possession. Looks like she's got it! Luzon coming in from the side-"

Whipping across the ice Manila accelerated in towards Acid, making a reach for the puck. Acid had seen her coming and turned trying to block Manila with her body. Manila bent forward, trying to get at the puck. Acid brought the blunt end of her stick back and up, hard, right into Manila's face as she arrived at high speed. It hit Manila directly just under the visor of her helmet. Manila's head snapped back, she flew off her feet and hit the ground hard, her helmet smacking loudly against the ice. Acid straightened and looked down at Manila, smirking. Manila did not get up.

There was a huge gasp from the crowd and the referee's whistle rang out in the sudden quiet. Raja's mouth fell open as she stared in shock.

Several things happened at once.

Laganja appeared from nowhere and slammed Acid into the boards, yelling, shoving her and grabbing her jersey. Acid retaliated, hitting back and shouting.

"That was fucking intentional! Get her off the ice!" shrieked Alyssa, jumping to her feet. Manila had managed to roll herself over onto her stomach, one gloved hand over her nose.

"-Edwards defending her teammate," said the announcer, "and Luzon's still down on the ice, this looks like an injury-"

"Damn it!" added Alyssa, at top volume, "Get off her Laganja!"

The referee was trying to break up the fight, but wasn't having much luck. Laganja and Acid had each other by their jerseys, grappling, gloves scattered on the ground, yelling into one another's faces.

"Oh fuck," muttered Raja under her breath, craning her neck to see Manila who was now surrounded by three members of her team. Shangela knelt down next to her and managed to get Manila's arm around her shoulders, helping Manila up to her knees. Kasha was on her other side and bent down, hoisting Manila upright. A round of clapping and cheering went up from the crowd as she was led off the ice between the two of them. Acid had been ousted to the penalty box, and Laganja was still arguing with the referee. 

Seeing Manila struggle to keep upright, a sick feeling settled deep in Raja's stomach, and it only grew worse when she noticed the drops of blood on the ice where Manila had been lying.

"Fuck," cursed Raja, looking around helplessly. She grabbed her bag, turned and walked swiftly up the steps of the stands with Alyssa hot on her heels. Raja rushed down the stairs at the top of the arena into the wide hallway below. She hesitated, not sure which way the lockers room were.

"This way," said Alyssa, coming off the staircase and heading left. Raja hurried behind her, desperately wishing she'd had one less beer. Alyssa led her to a nondescript door, which she shouldered open.

It was a wide square room, with black rubber matting on the floors and wooden benches running around the perimeter. There were wooden pegs and cubbies running above the benches and there were bags, boots, jackets, extra sticks and random items all over. On one end there was a doorway leading to a shower/washroom area.

Manila was sitting on a bench, leaning back against the brown-painted cement block wall and crying softly. Her bleeding nose was dripping down her lips and chin, leaving stains on her blue and white jersey. 

Shangela and Kasha had both abandoned their gloves and helmets. Shangela was digging through her large hockey bag, cursing. Kasha was kneeling in front of Manila, unlacing her skates and speaking to her in a quiet voice. 

Alyssa immediately rushed over to Manila and sat down next to her, taking her hand and asking how she was doing. With a loud "Aha!" Shangela held up a pack of wet wipes from the depths of her bag and walked over to Manila. Kasha took one of Manila's skates off her foot and proceeded to unlace the other one.

Raja approached tentatively, not sure where to go with Shangela and Alyssa on either side of Manila and Kasha in front of her. She decided to sit next to Alyssa. Manila looked over slowly and made eye contact with Raja, smiling a little. Her eyes seemed glassy.

A third woman that Raja didn't recognize burst in the door, muttering, "This fucking gauze is from the '90s."

She was digging through some kind of medical kit. The woman placed the kit down on the bench, and took two flexible cold packs out from under her arm.

"Put that on the back of her neck," she instructed, handing the cold pack to Alyssa. The woman's long blonde hair flipped around as she turned back to medical kit.

"You'll be okay, honey," said Alyssa to Manila, putting the ice pack to her neck.

"Can you take her helmet off?" the blonde asked briskly.

"I wouldn't, Brooke Lynn," sad Kasha. They all looked at her. "I've seen a lot of injuries, this is probably a concussion and we should wait for a nurse or someone to remove it. Don't want to jostle her brain anymore."

"Okay," said the blonde woman now identified as Brooke Lynn, "Ugh, shit. She looks like she needs to go to hospital."

"I'm gonna puke," said Manila and leaned over, retching.

In a surprising show of nimbleness Kasha reached for a wastebasket and placed it under Manila's head.

"I've got to go check on Laganja," said Alyssa to Raja, quietly, "Can you take over?"

"Yes."

"Okay, here." Alyssa handed Raja the ice pack, and said to Manila, "I've got to go check on Laganja honey, but I'll be back soon. Raja's here."

Manila stopped vomiting and sat back up again. Shangela handed her another wet wipe, she dazedly wiped her mouth and said, "Bye…" 

Her nose had started to bleed again in earnest and Raja edged closer to her on the bench, placing the ice pack on the back of her neck.

"Nausea, vomiting, dizziness, not to mention her nose is definitely broken…" Kasha was listing symptoms to Brooke Lynn, who was turned away, speaking into her cellphone.

"I wanna take my helmet off," Manila said.

"We've gotta wait on that," replied Shangela, passing her another wet wipe, "We're gonna try to stop that nose from bleeding everywhere first. You look like fucking Carrie in here."

Manila laughed and winced. Kasha had wrangled her other skate off and was attempting to remove the long socks that covered her shin guards.

"Try leaning your head back," said Brooke Lynn, hanging up.

"No," said Kasha, "That can pool the blood in the skull."

"I'm the fucking coach, Kasha."

"Yeah, and my wife's a trauma nurse."

"Fine," Brooke Lynn turned from Kasha to Raja, and asked, "And who are you?"

"I'm her girlfriend," replied Raja, glaring.

Brooke Lynn paused and seemed to realize she wasn't helping, "Okay. I'm going to go do some crowd control and bring my van around the side, try to get her out of her equipment as much as you can." She knelt down next to Kasha in front of Manila, "We're gonna get you to the hospital, okay?"

Manila nodded, and Brooke Lynn stood up and spun on her heel, leaving the locker room.

Still holding the cold pack to the back of her neck, Raja took a better look at Manila. Her pupils seemed a bit dilated, and her nose had a nasty split across the bridge, and a distinct lump just above it. Some swelling was beginning to show. The bleeding was slowing and Shangela was doing her best to keep it out of Manila's mouth and clean it off her chin with the wet wipes. Raja sighed as she realized that without taking Manila's helmet off they couldn't remove her jersey with any ease, or her chest and shoulder pads. This was going to be a long night.

Kasha had managed to remove Manila's shin guards, and they got her to stand up (supported by Raja and Shangela, she was still dizzy) and removed her bulky shorts as well as her elbows guards. Manila looked quite pathetic in her bloody jersey, her legs seemed tiny compared to her bulky torso where she was still wearing her shoulder pads. Raja and Kasha walked Manila out of the locker room and then to a side door that Raja had no idea existed. Kasha seemed to know all the nooks and crannies of the arena.

Like she had promised, there was Brooke Lynn's minivan pulled up by the side door. Raja and Manila sat in the backseat and the drive was quick and uneventful. Brooke Lynn took care to make the ride as smooth as possible for Manila.

000

Once they got to the hospital Brooke Lynn went inside with them and helped get Manila checked in. Raja thanked her for driving and she left to go back to the arena.

They stayed in the waiting room for a long time, Manila still wearing her stained jersey. There was a streak of dried blood on her chin where Shangela hadn't managed to wipe it all up, but thankfully her nose had stopped bleeding. Luckily, the nurse on site had carefully removed Manila's helmet after Raja asked about it. The nurse said that although it presented very little risk to furthering her injury, they had done the right thing to wait for a professional just in case. This allowed them to remove Manila's shoulder pads, leaving her much more comfortable.

Raja occupied the waiting time by reading aloud to Manila from a novel she'd downloaded onto her phone a while ago but hadn't got around to starting. 

"Halleloo!" 

Raja turned around to see Shangela with a big grin on her face at the front of a group of people carrying three big paper bags of takeout. Alyssa and Laganja were with her, along with Kasha, Renae and Morgan and surprisingly, Chad Michaels and Sharon Needles from the other team. At this point Raja was feeling like the game had happened days ago.

"Hey," greeted Raja, "Wow, thank you so much for bringing food."

"No problem at all," said Shangela, putting the bags down on a chair next to Raja and Manila. 

"Now tell me honey," Shangela asked Manila, "You still feeling nauseous? 'Cause I didn't bring you all of this food just to see it come up again!"

Manila rolled her eyes and laughed, "I'm not gonna throw up again Shangela, I'm starving actually."

"Good! Let's eat!"

Everyone gathered in various chairs around them (luckily it was a large waiting area with plenty of seats) and took various items out of the takeout bag. Shangela had brought a small army of plastic forks.

The group stayed in the waiting area with Manila and Raja for a couple hours. Chad and Sharon left after they spoke to Manila privately, in low tones. Raja tried to eavesdrop but was unsuccessful. However, judging by her corner-of-the-eye observations they appeared to be apologizing on behalf of their team for Acid's actions. That wasn't good enough for Raja, who maintained a cold shoulder towards them.

Manila was still holding the now barely cool cold-pack to her face, trying to keep the swelling down. Blue and purple bruises were beginning to form under her eyes and along her nose. Raja sighed, the injury was frightening looking but hopefully it wasn't as bad as it seemed. But judging by the concussion, the bleeding, the swelling and the bruising… Acid must have hit her really hard.

Finally the doctor called Manila in to examine her and set her nose. Shangela and the others chatted in the waiting area. Raja slowly gathered up all the empty takeout containers and put them in the recycling.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> if anyone is interested in getting into women's hockey, watch the canada vs usa gold medal match from sochi 2014, it's one of the most compelling games i've ever seen with a really high level of play and competition. i watched it for inspiration for this chapter lol. it's available in full on youtube!


	6. Recovery

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Manila recovers, Raja speculates, Alyssa interferes and Laganja shows up with chips.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> ..... aaaaaand I'm back! It's raining wildly where I am but here's another chapter! A little shorter than usual, but I hope you enjoy it <3

"Ugh, she's the worst…" Manila groaned, holding a fresh cold pack to her face.

They were finally home after a very long night and it was about three in the morning. Raja and Shangela were watching her closely, sitting at the small kitchen table in Manila's apartment. Shangela drove them home from the hospital, since she had Manila's hockey equipment and personal stuff gathered up in her car already. Manila hadn't said much at the hospital, nor when she had first taken the hit, but she seemed a bit more talkative now.

"A huge bitch," nodded Shangela, squeezing Manila's free hand.

"She didn't even apologize," sighed Manila. 

"No she didn't, and that was not cool," said Shangela, "After a fucking foul like that, not cool at all."

Raja sat silently, watching Manila's face. Half of it was covered by the cold pack, and the half that wasn't had a bruise slowly blossoming out from her nose into her left cheek and eye. Raja felt cold inside. After Manila had been hit in the face by Acid Betty with the blunt end of her stick, Shangela and Kasha had brought Manila off the ice. Manila's head had been lolling and her nose bleeding down her jersey. Raja, heart in her throat, had run down from the stands into the hallway underneath to meet them.

"-anyway I think she should get thrown out of the league," continued Shangela, "that hit was intentional and that isn't the point of this game, that's not what it's about, it's not even supposed to be a full-contact league!"

Manila nodded vaguely. She looked up at Raja and saw her watching, gave a half smile and winced. 

"I think I'm lucky though," Manila added, "Only a mild concussion…"

"Yeah that's true, but your nose is kinda fucked up," nodded Shangela again, "It could have been worse, hell I've seen worse happen in front of me. You remember what happened to Morgan? I was picking that girl's teeth off the ice! Literally!This is why you gotta wear a helmet with a cage. I've been saying it for years, should be mandatory. But there's those old school holdouts that don't like them… But usually it's just accidents. Like with Morgan it was an accident, just a loose puck and Dela felt real bad about it. You were there! Not this time though. Not some crazy bitch that has it out for you! Girl you know that's assault, legally. You could press charges, you know."

"I'm not gonna do that Shangie…"

Raja stood up abruptly and went into Manila's little kitchen to make tea. Shangela's righteous commentary was starting to wear on her. She understood that some people process things differently than others, and that Shangela was a close friend of Manila's even if she was a bit annoying. Not that there was that much to process, Raja sighed, it was just a sports injury, those happen all the time. But a little voice in the back of her head added, injuries are usually accidents, and this seemed weirdly… intentional. She unclenched her hands which were gripping the mug she was holding a little too tightly. Closing her eyes she did some deep breathing while she waited for the kettle to boil.

"You okay Raj'?" Manila's tired voice floated over from the table.

"Yeah, just making tea," Raja called back, and poured the hot water into three mugs. She could hear Shangela continue to go on about it. Raja rubbed her eyes, suddenly very tired.

Raja made her way back to the table with three steaming mugs of mint tea in hand. Luckily, Shangela had quieted down. Manila looked blearily at Raja and smiled, warming her hand around the mug. Raja sat down, grateful for the quiet and sipped hers. Shangela did the same. They sat in silence for a moment.

"Okay," said Shangela, "let's go over what the nurse said real quick, and then I'll get out of here."

Raja nodded and Manila said, "Okay."

"She said, put ice on your nose to keep the swelling down and take one of those painkillers every four hours. You've already had one."

"Yup," confirmed Manila.

"Then for the concussion she said, watch out for nausea, migraines and being disoriented. And that when you go to sleep tonight someone needs to wake you up every two hours and ask you some basic questions." Shangela looked at Raja.

"Yeah, I'll do that," said Raja.

"Okay, and then if she can't answer the questions or doesn't wake up, or if she seems fucked up or whatever, take her back to hospital." Shangela finished.

Manila snorted, then winced, "If I seem "fucked up," hah!"

"Girl you are fucked up," Shangela teased.

"I mean you're not wrong..." Manila smiled.

"Okay," said Raja, standing up, "Thanks for driving us home and for everything Shangela, I appreciate your help."

"Yeah thanks Shangie," Manila added, and leaned over to give Shangela a very gentle one-armed hug.

"Y'all are so welcome, anytime. Get well honey, love you," Shangela stood up and took a big gulp of the tea, "Ooh, that's hot! If there's anything you need from me, you have my number. Rest up and I'll see you two soon."

She gathered up her bag and left.

000

The night went uneventfully. When Raja woke Manila up for the third time with random questions ("What's your address? Who's the current president? What year was the NHL expansion?") Manila groaned in annoyance and swatted at her. But all was well (medically speaking) and they slept in. Raja had called in sick for work, and Manila had done the same, forwarding the doctor's note she'd been supplied with. Their morning was slow and lazy, with Raja spending a lot of time trying to find things in Manila's kitchen and borrowing her laptop to keep up with work. The bruises on Manila's face had blossomed into their full colour, deep blue under her eyes and yellowish purple across her nose and brow. It was hard to look at. However, the swelling had gone down overnight and with the continued application of cold packs.

Around lunchtime there was an unexpected knock at the door. Manila remained on the couch in sweatpants with a cold pack on her face, and Raja went to answer it.

She opened it to see the green-haired Laganja standing there, holding a big bag of chips.

"Oh, hi Laganja," said Raja.

"Hey, Miss Raja," replied Laganja, smiling, "Manila's here right?"

"Uh, yeah she is, come in," Raja held the door open and stepped aside.

Laganja entered confidently, clearly familiar with the apartment. She kicked off her Doc Martens and went into the living room.

Manila greeted her with a friendly smile and tired eyes, "Hey 'Ganja, how are ya?"

"I'm good, you look like you got run over," Laganja laughed and sat on the couch, reaching over and giving Manila one-armed hug, "I'm on lunch break today and have a spare period after so I figured I'd come over and see how you're doing. I brought chips!"

"Awesome!"

Raja was leaning against the frame at the edge of the room. She watched Manila and Laganja chat for a minute before turning away. Raja was nervous about leaving Manila on her own because symptoms could worsen within 24 hours of the initial head injury, so she'd accepted the idea of camping out at Manila's place for a little while. But, if Laganja was going to be here for a while, Raja could quickly bus to the arena to get her car, and then go her own place to get some fresh clothes and work stuff. Having her laptop would really help to keep up with work. Manila couldn't do much with her head injury, in fact she'd been specifically told to rest her eyes and avoid screens. While they were hanging out Raja could take the opportunity to catch up on work things.  
Leaving the two of them to chat, Raja quickly went to the bathroom and gathered up her bag from the night before. When she came back into the living room, Manila and Laganja were happily chatting away. 

"Hey," said Raja, "Would you two mind if I stepped out an hour? I need to get my car and swing by my apartment."

"Yeah," nodded Manila, "That's no problem, I could tell you wanted fresh clothes!"

"Yeah that's totally cool," added Laganja, "I've got the next couple hours free anyways so we can just hang out while you do your thing. And I can watch her for next-day symptoms or whatever."

"Okay," replied Raja, a little surprised by the teenager's confidence, "Well that's great, thanks Laganja. I'll see you two later!"

The trip took Raja about an hour. Sitting on the busy bus on her way to the arena, she stared at her phone and tried to focus on answering work emails. Small thoughts and speculations were circling in the back of her head. What had happened to Manila the other night… should she just call it an injury? Or was it an attack? An assault? It was a very strange situation. Picking up her car went smoothly and she went back to her apartment to shower and change clothes. The warm water streamed down onto her back and she sighed with relief, tired but regaining motivation.

Before she left Raja gathered up a few changes of clothes, toothbrush and moisturizer, her laptop and work notebooks. And some snacks. Raja was planning on staying with Manila for the next few days to help her recover and keep an eye on her. 

The day was warm, and the sun was bright on the dirty snow as Raja drove back. 

000

Raja opened the door to Manila's apartment quietly, and heard gentle music and voices from the other room.

"- wait you haven't told her?" Raja overheard Laganja say.

"Well I- wait I heard the door. Just- I'll figure it out, it's fine," replied Manila tightly.

"Okay, well," Laganja continued quietly. Raja realized that they knew she was there. She put her bag down and began to take off her boots, "-remember we're here for you. We have your back."

"Thanks girl, I know." There was a smile in Manila's voice now, as Raja hung up her coat, "I saw you fucking drop gloves for me out there! ! You're turning into a goon!"

"Oh my god!" Laganja laughed, "No…"

Raja took this opportunity to come around the corner into Manila's living room.

"Hey," she greeted them. They were both sitting with their feet up on the couch, music playing from the laptop. They had an open bag of chips between them. 

"Hey Raja!" greeted Laganja, "How was your journey?"

"It was good. Got my car, had a shower, y'know," Raja replied. Her curiosity had been piqued and she looked between them, trying to get a sense of what exactly they'd been discussing.

"That's great," said Manila, giving Raja a small smile, "We were chilling out and eating chips, but I haven't had lunch yet really…"

"I brought some groceries and stuff I had at my house," replied Raja, "I can whip something up."

"Aw that'd be great, thank you," said Manila, opening her arms in a silent request for a hug. 

Raja complied and went over to the couch, leaning down to wrap her arms around Manila and kiss her cheek. Laganja had the maturity to check her phone while Raja briefly cradled Manila. They decided that Laganja would stay for lunch before heading back to class.

Once Laganja had left, Raja joined Manila on the couch, where she had decided to take a nap. Raja was trying to work from home, but the mysterious conversation she'd overheard between Manila and Laganja had left her feeling on edge. Perhaps she should just ask Manila what was going on. But then again, she'd distinctly heard Manila say she'd heard the door open, knowing that Raja had just returned. Hmmm, well Raja supposed that whatever it was, Manila would tell her eventually. Raja tried to put it out of her mind. The rest of their evening was comfortable and restful.

000

The next afternoon Manila was napping in her bedroom, with the blinds pulled shut. Manila had been desperate to leave the house despite her instructions to rest her head as much as possible, so they'd gone for a short walk in the cold wind. Raja was out at Manila's small table with her laptop, reading up on the recent events of London Fashion Week. Her phone rang and she jumped. She saw it was an unknown number but answered it anyway.

"Hello?"

"Hello there Rah-ja, this is Alyssa Edwards, I got your number from Shangela."

"Oh, hi Alyssa, what's up?" Raja said, curious.

"Are you with Manila?"

"Yeah, I'm at her apartment but she's napping. Did you want to talk to her?"

"No, I wanted to talk to you just for a minute."

"Uh-huh."

"Now," Alyssa paused, and Raja folded her arms shifting her weight around on the chair, "I'm not sure what all Shangela has said to you about Acid, you know, the one who injured Manila last night."

"Not a whole lot," said Raja cautiously, "she sort of implied they knew each other, and Acid having it out for her."

Alyssa took a breath in, "Okay. I am not sure why Manila or someone else hasn't mentioned it but I think you should know, Acid is Manila's ex girlfriend."

"What?" Raja replied loudly, then she glanced at Manila's bedroom's doorway, quickly padded into the kitchen and repeated more quietly, "What? They were in a relationship?"

"Yes, it was just over a year ago. Manila was new here, she had just moved to the city and didn't know very many people. They met through the league, but a few months in Manila dropped out. That was when everyone, including myself, started to know her pretty well. They were together for 10 months or so. When we invited her to come to our cookouts and whatnot it started to become 'Acid thinks this- Acid says we're busy-' and then she wouldn't show up."

"So was it like - how did it end?" Raja asked, running a hand through her hair.

"I -," Alyssa hesitated, and then seemed to gain confidence, "Manila ended it, I believe. And I recall Acid made a big fuss about it, about Manila being a terrible person and how she had betrayed her. Acid had been a pillar of the community for while and she played the story like Manila was some young upstart that showed up and messed her around. Many folks mistrusted Manila because of this. It's not good when there is drama in such a close-knit community. But then eventually we dragged her back to the rink and to the team when Acid had gone out of town for work last winter. Manila was a shadow of her former self, she seemed nervous and stressed out. Folks got used to her again. Now, as you can see, Manila is quite lively. She never said anything bad about the relationship, in fact she has said hardly anything about it at all. So."

"Okay, uh," said Raja, trying to process the information.

"Anyway," continued Alyssa, "I had my suspicions at the time. I have been in some bad relationships myself," She paused, "Acid has come and gone from the city every so often since then. But this is the first time that that Acid's been actively playing again. And now this… injury has happened. I did hesitate to contact you, but I believe this may be more serious than any of us realize. This is violence. I don't think, but - well… it can escalate. I have had a similar situation happen to myself, when I had ended things with my ex-husband. But I ended up in the ER, and then I moved here." Alyssa ended her statement with a dramatic inhale.

"Okay," said Raja again, "Uhm, okay." She paced the kitchen, trying to think. "Thank you for telling me Alyssa. I felt suspicious too. I - I'm not sure what to do." Raja had a sick feeling in her stomach. The idea that this most-likely abusive relationship had happened to Manila and that her ex had now assaulted her, twice in fact, in public, with the thin excuse of 'accidents and fights happen in hockey...'

"Don't worry, Miss Raja," Alyssa said comfortingly, "We'll take care of it, all of us together cause we're her family. From what I can tell, when Manila is hurt she likes to hide, she doesn't like to show it, and… sometimes it can take a while to admit to yourself how bad things are. I don't think we need to confront her about this just now while she's recovering."

"Okay, yes, that sounds right." said Raja, nodding. "And thank you again for telling me Alyssa, I really didn't know-"

"It's alright," said Alyssa soothingly, "You're good people. Now we've just gotta do that thing where we hold her close and give her space at the same time."

"Ha!" Raja laughed a little, diffusing some of the anger she felt.

They said goodbye and hung up. Raja gripped the counter, took a deep breath and let it out slowly. She could feel anxiety and worry roiling in her stomach. Breathing deeply through her nose she counted to ten. Then she filled the kettle and listened to it come to a boil, leaning against the counter and thinking.


	7. Shit Hits The Fan

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The week rolls by and Raja confronts Acid.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Yikes! Seven chapters! Thanks to all readers who have followed this story on its weird journey :) this chapter is pretty angsty so buckle your seatbelts...

Raja sat on the information Alyssa had given her while Manila recovered. Her bruises faded quickly, and the swelling on and around her nose went down. Her nose was healing nicely, with just a small bump on the bridge. The emergency doctor had done a good job, and she'd been lucky. "Phew! Could've ended up looking like Ovechkin," Manila had joked, face joyful and relieved. Despite Raja's best efforts, a laugh slipped out. When Manila later showed her who 'Ovechkin' was, she laughed even harder.

They were spending more time together, since Raja had taken on the role of helping Manila recover and was staying at her apartment. That was unusual for Raja, who wasn't a particularly nurturing type. She was more of a accidently-kill-every-house-plant-Raven-had-gifted-her-for-a-decade type. However it wasn't the act of regularly checking on Manila that had been bothering her, but rather the weight of the information she'd learned from Alyssa, and all the unknowns it brought up. Raja didn't have the best track record with coping with anxiety and worry, but she was trying.

It was a Monday night and they were relaxing on Manila's couch eating dinner together. Manila had had her first day back at work and Raja picked her up afterwards. They had gone grocery shopping and Raja had cooked for them in Manila's small kitchen.

"-anyway, the doctor said I'm probably clear to go back to practice next week so long as I take it easy, and then maybe start playing again in two weeks!" Manila said enthusiastically, "I felt really good at work. Like my eyes are kind of tired and I'm glad I'm starting off with a couple of half-days cause concussions are so weird, they make it hard to use your eyes and your brain-"

"You want to go back so soon?" said Raja, putting her empty plate down on the coffee table.

"Yeah, I miss the team," replied Manila, scooping some vegetables into her mouth, "and I want to get the exercise, and I really don't want to miss the playoffs."

Raja nodded in passive agreement. She was turning over what Alyssa had said regarding what Raja now dubbed 'the Acid situation.' The fact that Manila seemed eager to go right back into the arena where she'd been assaulted didn't play well in her mind. Neither did the fact that Manila still hadn't bothered to mention that key piece of information to her; Manila's former relationship with Acid Betty. Worry tightened Raja's brow.

"Do you think you'll go back to games immediately or just stick to practices for now?" asked Raja.

"Hmm, no if I'm gonna bother I'll do it all," responded Manila, looking down at her plate and forking up the last bits of food, "Like why practice and then not go to games?"

"I was thinking you're less likely to get checks during practices, you know, that might…" Raja hesitated, "cause set-backs in your recovery or get you hurt again. Multiple head injuries are dangerous."

"If I'm going in fully recovered then there won't be any setbacks," stated Manila, putting her plate down on the table with Raja's and looking up at her, "Besides, I've got a good new helmet with a cage, and like I said big hits don't happen that often. I mean you've seen a few games now, it's pretty rare."

"Yeah it is," conceded Raja, "Still. This happened."

"I know," said Manila, "But it's not gonna happen again. It'll be fine."

"Well, you can't know that for sure."

"I'm pretty sure," said Manila, rolling her eyes, "Relax Raja, it'll be fine."

Raja was caught, she didn't want to escalate the conversation into an argument, but Manila had shut out any debate about going back to hockey. She sighed and leaned in to give Manila a hug, "I'm just worried about you."

"I know, but you don't need to be," Manila replied, snuggling into her, "I know it's a contact sport and everything but I just love it so much, I'm not going to let this keep me away from the rink any longer than it has to y'know?"

"Yeah, I understand."

Raja privately decided to do some reconnaissance before bringing up the subject again. Alyssa, Laganja and Shangela had been around to visit a couple of times. Shangela once jokingly threatened to track Acid down and "return the favour" for Manila's injury, but Manila had quickly laughed that off and changed the subject. Raja thought perhaps she'd get in touch with one of them and ask if Acid had received any repercussions for her actions, such as being kicked out of the league. If Acid had been kicked out, then she probably wouldn't interact with Manila again, and it wouldn't be an issue for Manila to return to hockey. Raja hoped this was the situation.

All thoughts of reconnaissance and ice hockey fled her mind when she realized that Manila's snuggling against her had turned into Manila gently kissing her neck. Raja exhaled and bit her lip as Manila kissed her way up to Raja's jawline, slowly repositioning herself so she was straddling Raja's lap.  
Raja ran her hands up and down Manila's thighs and chuckled quietly, before catching her mouth in a passionate kiss.

-

It was the first week of playoffs. The tournament determined which team would win the oversized novelty trophy decorated with rainbow flags that was kept in a well-loved if dingy cabinet at the arena. Although Manila wasn't playing yet due to her concussion, she still insisted that she and Raja go to watch her team's game. If the team lost this game they wouldn't advance any further on the competition. As they walked up to the arena together Raja put her arm around Manila, squeezing the younger woman's shoulders. Manila smiled up at her as they proceeded in through the doors together. 

As usual, they went up the stairs to the track that ran a long the top edge of the stands, and then down the steps to Raja's preferred spot. Alyssa was already there, waving at them. 

They sat down and the game began.

It was an exciting match. Laganja was doing particularly well, taking many shots on goal and Alyssa and Manila reacted passionately to each one. Raja realized she had never watched the game live with Manila before. Usually Manila was the one on the ice. If anything it was hilarious. Manila was very invested, just like Alyssa, and had no hesitations about shouting at the players, teasing and commenting on the game. Raja smiled quietly to herself, it was nice to see Manila so happy. 

Raja tried to catch Alyssa alone, to ask her if she'd heard anything about what had happened to Acid. But Raja didn't end up doing so. Manila was determined to avoid any discussion of the subject, and since Manila's team was playing against a different team tonight, Acid wasn't on the ice. Truly, it was an ideal scenario, thought Raja.

Raja did not have her usual several beers. She had made a point of staying sober, just to keep an eye on the technically-still-concussed-but-mostly-fine Manila. By the time they were leaving she was feeling much more alert than usual. 

Manila and Raja were standing at the edge of the hallway leading out of the arena with Alyssa and Vivienne, waiting for Laganja and Shangela to get out of the locker room. They were chatting and letting the rest of the crowd stream past them.

All of a sudden a familiar figure appeared out of the crowd, greeting Manila in a low voice, "Hey."

Raja glanced up and noticed Acid Betty, a feeling of intense dislike spiking through her. The woman was tall, taller than Manila but not as tall as Raja (who observed this with absurd, fleeting pride.) Up close she had a beautiful face with a chiseled jaw and high cheekbones, and surprisingly delicate long eyelashes. Her pink hair was perfectly coiffed. 

"Hey, Manila, can I talk to you for a minute?" asked Acid.

"Uh, sure," replied Manila, a blank look on her face. But she didn't move.

"Ah," Acid scratched the back of her neck and adopted a pleading look, "Privately?"

Alarm bells went off in Raja's mind, and she glanced at Alyssa. Alyssa had her eyes wide open and her her chin pulled in so much it disappeared completely into her neck. It was a comedic facial expression, one that certainly would have had Raja burst out laughing if the situation hadn't felt so serious.

"Yeah, okay," said Manila, not looking at either of them. Acid turned and walked away through the crowd, down the hall, Manila following her. Raja watched as they made their way to the end of the hall and turned the corner, into the corridor where the locker rooms and washrooms ran below the stands.

Raja inhaled deeply through her nose and slowly out through her mouth, trying to calm herself.

"Vivi, why don't you run along and and say hi to Bob and Dida? Meet us at the truck in fifteen," Alyssa said to Vivienne, and she nodded, disappearing into the crowd.

"She knows this place like the back of her hand," mused Alyssa, then she turned to face Raja, "You look upset."

"Oh, is it showing?" Raja asked sarcastically, "Yeah, I don't like this. What the fuck does Acid want?"

"Just breathe, honey."

"I know. I'm breathing."

"Mm-hm. I don't like it either," Alyssa confessed, "But she might be apologizing. She might want to talk it out. She might even be trying to convince Manila to get back together with her-" Alyssa stopped at the shocked look on Raja's face, "It won't work! But exes do try that."

"So I should give her the benefit of the doubt," said Raja, gritting her teeth.

"I'm saying be cautious. They haven't gone far, and Manila is a grown woman. She can handle herself," said Alyssa. 

"Why did you tell me… what you told me on the phone last week?" asked Raja, tucking a loose strand of hair behind her ear.

Alyssa was quiet for a moment, and stared out into the crowd, "You know I sometimes forget that Manila isn't my own daughter. I treat her like that occasionally. It isn't always fair of me. Maybe I intervened in a way that wasn't appropriate. But given the fact that this woman hit her in the face so goddamn hard it broke her nose and gave a her a concussion? I've seen that shit before. And with you looking after her? You needed to know the facts. The context, like." 

Raja nodded, murmuring in a low voice, "I couldn't believe she hadn't told me. She never even mentioned it."

Alyssa sighed, "Look, the relationship with Acid messed with her. She obviously isn't ready to bring it up. But I just thought you should know, cause none of this is your fault. There's not much we can do other than give her time and space."

Raja sighed as well, "You're right, I think. The whole thing sets my teeth on edge."

"Me too, honey."

Laganja and Shangela were rolling out of the locker room with their gear, towards Raja and Alyssa and the conversation changed to a more casual subject. The four of them discussed the game and upcoming events in the week. Raja reached into her bag and checked her phone, trying to figure out how long Manila had been talking to Acid. It must have been at least ten minutes. The crowd was thinning out and players were heading home, hoisting their bags.

A few minutes later Raja checked her phone again, and noticed Alyssa doing the same thing. They made eye contact and Alyssa's eyes softened, nodding at Raja. Raja turned on her heel and made a beeline down the hallway. Thinking quickly, she decided she'd glance around the corner and she'd just call out to Manila to say that the group was heading out and ask if she needed more time. Yes, that was… normal. That would be fine. Manila and Acid were just talking so it was probably nothing, right? Maybe Acid was apologizing. She had better be apologizing, Raja thought darkly.

But when Raja rounded the corner, she saw two figures at the far end of the hall. Manila's back was up against the painted cinderblock and Acid was leaning in aggressively, one hand planted on the wall next to Manila's head as she berated her, gesticulating aggressively for emphasis. Raja couldn't really see Manila's expression. But her body read as upset and tense.

"Hey!" Raja heard herself yell before it had registered as a thought.

Acid looked up, said one final thing to Manila that Raja couldn't hear. She turned to face Raja, arms crossed. Raja was hurrying down the hall towards the two of them.

"What? We're just talking," Acid sneered at her.

Manila didn't say anything, looking at the floor.

"Didn't look like it," replied Raja, trying to make eye contact with Manila.

"Wow, so uptight," remarked Acid, turning towards Manila. Manila bit her lip and stared fiercely at her shoes.

"Manila," Raja said, forcing her voice to stay calm, "Alyssa and her crew are heading out. I thought you might want to say goodnight, and congratulate Laganja."

"Yeah," Manila murmured, nodding. She looked like she was in a trance. She stood up off the wall and glanced at Acid before stepping over to Raja. 

"Someone's whipped," commented Acid, a mean grin on her face, "We're done here anyway."

Shocked, Raja's mouth fell open in offence and she made to reply but then Manila touched her arm, turning to go. Raja shot Acid a glare and turned to follow her. 

"Bye!" Acid called sarcastically after them.

-

The next day rolled around and Raja still felt irritated from the encounter with Acid. She'd been jittery at work, drinking too much coffee and replaying the scene over and over in her head. Something was very wrong between Manila and Acid. After their conversation Manila had returned to the group in the hallway and brightened up, joking with them as they drifted through the parking lot to their respective vehicles. In the car with Raja she kept the conversation light, chatting non-stop about nothing in particular. Raja didn't bring up the interaction with Acid, presuming Manila would. Manila hadn't. Instead Manila had quietly requested that Raja go back to her own apartment for the night. Resentfully, Raja had acquiesced. Presumably Manila needed some quiet time to think through… whatever the hell that conversation was. It made Raja feel sick and sympathetic, and then sick again. 

The only reprise she'd had was opening up to Raven and discussing it on their lunch break at work. Raven, who knew about Manila's injury but hadn't yet been caught up on the complexity behind it, was shocked. Her fierce brows came together in concern, and she made her opinions known. Raven didn't pull any punches.

The afternoon rolled out with Raja spending far more time than she should trawling through Acid's social media. Through this, she discovered a bar where Acid regularly hung out.

Raja came home from work and some distantly self-aware part of her brain could feel herself anxiously spiralling. Her fingers kept itching for her purse, where she hadn't kept cigarettes in years. 

She ate dinner distractedly, trying to calm down. It didn't work.

She smoked a joint. It didn't work. 

Raja wished she could talk to Manila about this. Just to find out what was going on. But she couldn't. Manila was going through… whatever it was she was going through. They'd have to talk about it at some point. Raja resolved to confront her soon. Definitely by the weekend. But this resolution didn't smooth the deep track the worry had rent in her brain. Helplessly, she fixated on Acid's instagram page. It made her angry, it made her want to act.

She had a glass of wine. It didn't work.

-

All of this led Raja to where she currently was: sitting in her car in the parking lot of a bar on the edge of downtown. Taking a deep breath, she opened the door and stepped out.

Raja hurried through the parking lot towards the bar. She quickly spotted Acid Betty and her crew standing outside of it, the pink-haired woman in the centre of the group, holding a cigarette and laughing. She was wearing a shirt with a donut pattern and a tight black skirt. The smoke mingled with their breath, visible in the cold night air. Fuelled by an anger deep in her gut and the rolling anxiety of the evening, Raja stalked up to them, calling out.

"Hey!"

Acid turned to look at her, eyeing her up and down.

"What do you want?" she asked. The taught-faced blond woman next to her stuck out chin and postured aggressively. Raja merely raised a contemptuous eyebrow. Raja walked up close to Acid, using her height to bear over the other woman. Her black jacket reflected the red neon light of the bar signs.

Acid flicked some ash off her cigarette towards Raja, hooded eyes flashing, "Wait a second I recognize you, you're that new piece Manila's been bringing around."  
Raja's eyes narrowed. Her heart was pounding, she felt like she could fly out of control at any moment.

"I know that hit was intentional," Raja hissed, eyes burning.

A small smile crept across Acid's face, "You can't prove it."

"If you ever lay a hand on Manila again, and I mean even fucking breathe in her direction," threatened Raja, putting as much ice and vitriol into her voice as she could manage, "I will find you and fuck you up."

"Oh, right sure," responded Acid sarcastically, "I'm so scared of you. That little bitch is asking for it."

"You heard me, now don't fucking tempt me," snarled Raja, and spat on the ground. She took a few steps back, then turned on her heel and marched back to her car.

Shoving her keys in the ignition, Raja found herself breathing heavily, the tension from the night before finally rushing out of her body. She struggled to a take a deep breath, and then let it out and focused her breathing until it became even. 

Once her heart had slowed and her breath had calmed she started the car and headed down the street. Instead of turning in the direction of home, she went out on the wide street towards the bridge.

Raja had only been in a couple of fights in her life. They were rare, but when they happened the electric adrenaline pumping through her veins and the visceral feeling of violent contact left her shaken. As she drove one particular memory caught her by surprise. It had been a spring day when she was in middle school. The dirty, rotten snow had crunched under her feet, while the sun beat down out of the clear sky. She'd been backed into a corner by a group of girls, lead by one in particular who seemed to have it out for her. Raja was only beginning to discover her sexuality at the time, but perhaps even those vague inklings of queerness had put a target on her back. Even if that hadn't been what the bullies were after her for there were plenty of other excuses: she was awkward, too tall, brown-skinned, had a foreign accent, and was different. She hadn't yet figured out how to own those things, as she had now in her later years.

Driving over the bridge, Raja took in the night sky and the blinking city lights. She exhaled, the memory continuing down it's winding path. 

They had thrown things at her and called her names, threatening her. Their words had terrified her, trapping the air in her chest. She'd become very scared, panic crushing her lungs. Looking back, it seemed unlikely anything overly serious would have happened. But then the main girl had pulled Raja's jacket over her head and was joking about pushing her out into the busy road. Unable to see, with tears streaming down her cheeks she had struggled out of the jacket and punched the girl in the face. Once, twice, three times. It was so quick Raja barely felt it, although her hand was bruised the next day. The girl stumbled back, landing on the ground. Her lip was bloody. Everyone froze. 

Still panicked, Raja grabbed her jacket and ran for it. She remembered feeling like a rabbit running across a field away from a hawk. No one had followed her and she eventually made her way home using a circuitous alternative route. The girls mostly let her be after that, only occasionally calling her names. Raja made sure not to be alone. They ended up going to different high schools, and she hadn't thought about them in years. 

Shaking her head, she turned the car around and headed towards home. The night drive had been comforting, despite the weird memory. Her confrontation with Acid hadn't gone as far as a fight, which was probably a good thing, Raja reasoned. No self-respecting thirty-six year old woman should be caught throwing hands with her girlfriend's ex.


	8. We're Going In Cirlces

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> A long and painful evening for Raja as things finally unravel completely.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> okay folks this is the final chapter it's long af and angsty af and super dialogue heavy… i hope it breaks your entire ass heart…

They were at the arena again. Manila had insisted on participating in her team's practice, early Sunday evening. Raja, who was feeling better after her confrontation with Acid Betty and the relative civility of the past few days, agreed to drive her. She'd wanted to go out with Manila the day before, but Manila had wanted to rest, so it hadn't worked out. There was lot hanging between them, unresolved, and it irritated Raja like loose strands of hair tickling her neck. 

But - like a coward, she added critically - she hadn't yet discussed any of it with Manila. Though part of her desperately wanted to, the rest was cringing in avoidance. Maybe it would all go away. Raja fiddled with her hair, which she'd put in a low braid.

While Manila practiced Raja ran errands. The grocery store was empty for a Sunday evening and she sighed, staring at the shelves.

Raja returned to the arena just before the end of practice, chatting with Alyssa just inside the doors. They steered away from any serious subjects, joking about weed, the news and the state of their respective vehicles. 

Manila came out of the locker room with her gear. She looked tired. 

Alyssa stepped out for a cigarette, and Raja and Manila stood together awkwardly. Manila was glancing around the hallway while the other players streamed out of the locker room, stopping to talk in the hall or heading straight for the parking lot.

"So," said Raja, "Are you ready to leave or…?"

"Uh, not yet," Manila replied vaguely, still looking around the hallway, "I'm just going to go find Laganja again, I wanted to tell her something."

"Okay," said Raja. 

Manila put her equipment bag and stick down in a corner, then wandered off down the hallway. Raja turned and shouldered open the glass door, breathing in the cold night air. The awkwardness and tension between them was breaking Raja's heart. 

Wandering around the near doors, Raja saw Shangela and another couple of women talking in the cold. She approached and stood with them for a few minutes, cracking jokes and lingering.

Then suddenly Raja heard her name being called from over by the doors. 

"Raja!" Manila was backlit by the lights outside the arena, twisting her hands together nervously. Raja turned away from her conversation with Shangela and went over to Manila. 

"What's up?" asked Raja.

"Did you-" Manila hesitated, "Did you talk to Acid about me?"

"What? No," lied Raja, a sinking feeling in her stomach.

"You did," said Manila, hurt.

"Well, I-"

"Why would you do that?"

"I-" spluttered Raja, "I didn't talk to her about you. I just had to-" she scrambled for words, trying to explain or describe her state of mind when she'd tracked down and confronted Acid, "I -she- I was worried-"

"That's not okay! You can't do that!" cried Manila.

"I can talk to whoever I want," snapped Raja. The sinking feeling in her stomach had turned hot, angry.

"Yeah, so can I!"

"Oh, you think it's fine," said Raja harshly, taking a step toward Manila, "You think it's all fine and fucking dandy to be out having little chats with your ex- oh yeah I know she's your ex-" added Raja, to Manila's look of surprise, "You think it's fine to lie to me about that?"

"It's none of your damn business-" snapped Manila, defensive.

"I looked after you. I lived at your apartment for two weeks and woke you up every two hours and all that shit when you got that concussion that you're still not fully healed from!" Raja cut in, "And who fucking gave it to you?"

"It's not like that-"

"It is. It is like that," Raja fired back, righteous anger boiling over, "That bitch hits you in the face so hard it breaks your nose and gives you a concussion? And you don't even bother tell me she's your fucking ex-girlfriend? What- what am I supposed to do?"

Manila was frozen, face in an ugly frown. Raja breathed into the night air, adrenaline flowing through her veins.

"It was accident," started Manila, voice shaking, "It's a sport injury-"

"No," said Raja, "If it was anyone else maybe, but your fucking ex made that hit. Intentionally. And you know what else?"

Manila was silent, eyes wide.

"You knew. You know exactly how this looks, which is why you didn't tell me."

Manila looked away, mouth opening and closing.

"You think I don't get exactly what's going on here?"

"No!" Manila shouted, hurt and desperation in her voice, "No! You don't get it. You're - you're drawing conclusions that aren't there! She's not like that, she wouldn't- she didn't-"

"How can you possibly not see this?" intoned Raja, suddenly aware they were making a scene in the parking lot and desperately trying to calm it down, to get Manila on her side, forcing steadiness into her voice, "Your ex has assaulted you, under the guise of it being an accident, and-"

"No. Stop," Manila backed away from her, hands up, "I'm not talking about this anymore. I need a fucking minute…" she turned and stomped off.

"Manila!" yelled Raja, then clicked her tongue in frustration and turned on her heel. Looking around the parking lot, she noticed a few people pointedly looking away from her. Shangela was watching them both with concern. Giving Raja a nod, Shangela stepped away from her group and pursued Manila. 

Growling under her breath, Raja stalked over to the other side of building, facing the street. Rounding the corner, she saw Alyssa leaned up against the brick wall tapping a cigarette out of it's carton. Raja went over, leaning up against the wall next to her. She pulled out her phone and fired off a quick text to Raven. The cold wind blew, taking wisps of her grey-streaked hair out of it's braid.

"God. Fuck," muttered Raja, as the smell of Alyssa's cigarette drifted over to her,

"You okay?"

"No- I," managed Raja, "How much of that did you hear?"

"Parts."

"Right. Well," sighed Raja, the fight suddenly gone from her, "This is fucked up. How can she not see it?"

"Regulation denial," Alyssa nodded to herself, "Complicated emotions. She's not going to see it until she lets herself see it, and you arguing with her about it won't help much. Let me tell ya, I volunteer at the women's shelter down on Brunswick Street, you see this kind of behaviour a lot," she exhaled a cloud of smoke into the night, "Give her some time and she'll be alright."

"I don't know if that's true," said Raja, "Fuck, I hate this Acid crap. I never want to hear that name again. Manila needs to get her head out of her ass and see this for what it is," crossing her arms, she glared at Alyssa, "and now you've got me jonesin' for a smoke."

"Ha, ha!" Alyssa smirked at her and blew smoke in the opposite direction. "You get downwind of me then girl cause I'm not giving you one."

Raja stared angrily out into the street, fingers twitching to her purse, as was her old habit. It was a clear night, the stars shone above them as Alyssa's smoke trailed off, tinted orange from the glowing streetlight. 

"It sounds like it's been a rough couple of weeks for you, honey," said Alyssa.

"You're not wrong," replied Raja. 

"Hey Mama!" said Laganja as she came around the corner of the building. Raja looked up at her voice and watched the green haired teen saunter over, "Manila's pissed off, eh?"

"Laganja! Don't talk about her like that, she's going through something," Alyssa chided. 

Laganja looked up at Raja, brought a small tightly-rolled joint to her pale lips and lit it. Raja glared back at her. Laganja inhaled and the end of her joint flared a bright red. She leaned her head back and exhaled into the night sky, then held out the little stub, offering it to Raja, "You want some? It's medicinal."  
Raja rolled her eyes, but accepted it anyway with a short thank you and took a deep drag. She definitely needed to calm down before talking to Manila again. Laganja kicked half-heartedly at the frozen snowbank between the sidewalk and the road. Raja coughed and then glanced over at Alyssa. 

"Hey, you approve of your daughter smoking this? How old is she again?"

"I'm eighteen," Laganja said proudly, chin up. 

Alyssa just laughed at her, and then added, "It's medical-grade, mainly CBD. You know I grow it at home."  
"I thought you grew it for yourself?"

"Nah, it's mainly for her actually," said Alyssa, "Helps with her mental health struggles, you know."

Laganja nodded, grinning.

"Fuck's sake…" Raja rolled her eyes.

Her phone started ringing aggressively in her pocket, and she answered immediately, taking a few steps away.

"Hello?"

"Hey, it's me."

"Oh," said Raja. It was Raven. Some wild part of her brain had been expecting Manila.

"So, what's happening? You texted earlier just saying things were fucked-"

"Yeah. Things are fucked."

"Well?"

"Ughh," Raja drew out the irritated groan, "Well, I confronted Manila about the whole thing with her ex, which you know, should be obvious right? Like she should know that it's - it's fucked up when your ex hits you in the face with the blunt end of a hockey stick, breaks your nose and gives you a fucking concussion. That's obvious to you right? How fucked up that is?" She could hear the tinge of desperation in her voice.

"Yes," replied Raven calmly, "Yes, it is fucked. But you know people don't always see it when they're in it. We've been over this. You remember me and Rebecca?"

"Yes," Raja nodded, "I remember."

"It was an awful nightmare of a relationship and I couldn't handle it."

"True."

"She was an asshole and she tried to ruin my self-esteem."

"Total asshole."

"Yes, and you remember how I behaved when all of you told me I could do better?"

Raja sighed, "Yeah, I remember."

"So, what did I do?" Raja could hear Raven moving the phone from one ear to the other.

"You said you were worried about her, and things were your fault too, and you just wanted to give it one more shot…"

"Yeah, until I didn't anymore."

"Yeah."

Raven paused, and Raja could hear her exhale into the phone. Just having Raven's presence on the other end of the line was a comfort, and Raja could feel some of the tension leaving her shoulders. A sudden gust of wind made the loose ends of her hair swirl around her face.

"Look," Raven continued, "I hear you, girl, you're frustrated. It's a pretty fucked situation, but you've gotta think about what Manila actually wants from this and not just assume. She lied to you about something serious. That's not good, but you can choose how to respond. I know you fly off the handle sometimes. Also, you've gotta ask her how she feels, not just tell her how fucked it is. Otherwise she's never going to get over it, and it'll just stay fucked up or get worse."

"You're right. I hate it when you're right."

"I know." Raja could hear the smile in Raven's voice, "It'll be alright. Also remember she's literally a baby, she hasn't gone through all this shit before. I still think she's too young for you, but whatever."

"Haha!" Raja laughed, "You're just jealous."

"Mmmm, yeah but I am not jealous of your situation. It's tough."

"Yeah, dark times."

"It's a crazy world."

"Oh by the way," Raja added, "She said she needed a minute and stormed off. Should I like… go find her?"

"Hmm, is she still concussed?"

"Not really."

"Well, do you have the car keys?"

"Yeah."

"Then she won't get very far, just wait it out. You should be able to talk calmly once you've both had a moment."

"Okay, sounds good," Raja felt much more settled with Raven's encouragement.

"You've got this."

"Thanks Raven, love you."

Raven said goodbye and they hung up.

Raja sighed into the cold night air and turned back to Alyssa and Laganja. The orange of the streetlight was reflecting in Alyssa's hair.

"I think I'm just gonna wait here for her to come back," sighed Raja, leaning back against the brick wall.

Laganja blew smoke in her direction and Alyssa flicked her cigarette butt to the ground. Laganja seemed to have made some wins in her battle with the snowbank, there were several deep gouges carved out, and bits of frozen snow scattered around the sidewalk.

"Sounds like a good idea," said Alyssa, nodding.

"Yeah, it's just Manila, she cools off quick," added Laganja, and pushed at her toque, adjusting it.

Raja rolled her eyes, "You're a literal child."

"Nah Miss Raja, I've seen some things," Laganja nodded to herself, "I saw my dad beat the shit outta my mama while she was pregnant with Vivi."

"Woah! Hey!" said Alyssa, shocked, "You didn't need to bring that up out of the blue!"

"I think it makes sense in the context of what's going on," replied Laganja.

Raja didn't say anything, surprised by Laganja's revelation. She stared quietly into the night and watched a few cars go by.

"I'm sorry that happened to you two," she said, "You certainly didn't deserve it."

"Nobody does. It was a long time ago, and far away from here," replied Alyssa calmly, "We're safe and well out of that life now. That's more than you can say for a lot of folks. You survive it, get out, help others and enjoy your life."

"Domestic violence touches the lives of one in four women," Laganja said matter-of-factly.

"Yeah, and it shows up when you least expect it," mused Raja, squinting at the sky. She could see a few stars.

"Pretty much," Laganja summed it up.

They all stared out into the street; Laganja kicking at the dirty snow, Alyssa and Raja lost in thought.

"Hey."

They all turned at the voice. Manila was standing at the corner of the building, hesitant.

"Hey," Raja said, hurrying over to her, words coming quickly, "I'm sorry I was so upset, I just- ah, this situation."

"It's okay," said Manila tightly, "Can you just um, can you drop me off at home?"

"Yeah sure," replied Raja. She turned and waved goodbye to Alyssa and Laganja who were making to leave as well.

Manila and Raja walked quietly side by side over to Raja's car. The lights flashed as it unlocked and they got in their respective sides. Shivering slightly, Raja put the keys in the ignition and got the heater going. She rubbed her hands together as the car warmed up. The silence sat awkwardly between them.

"I'm sorry I yelled at you," said Manila, looking out into the parking lot.

"It's okay," murmured Raja, trying to catch her eye, "It's a stressful situation. It's complicated."

"Yeah."

"So uh, yes, let's go home. I'll drop you off."

"Thanks."

Raja drove out of the parking lot and turned in the direction of Manila's apartment.

-

Raja pulled up to Manila's building and waited for her to get out. The drive had been mostly silent. Raja was feeling a rush of guilt about her outburst earlier. She thought back to Raven and Alyssa's advice. Maybe there would be some way to make it right.

"So, uh," Manila spoke up, "Do you want to come up?"

Raja looked at her like a deer in the headlights.

"Uh, yeah," replied Raja, "I guess so." 

She found a parking spot and they got out, Manila throwing her hockey gear over her shoulder. They went up and inside, both kicking off their boots in silence. Manila dumped her hockey gear in her closet and then made her way to the living room. Raja followed. 

Manila sat on the couch, and Raja joined her. Raja waited for Manila to say something, but Manila just kept glancing around the room, eyeing Raja and then looking away. Not making eye contact. Still feeling unsettled from their argument, Raja kept quiet.

Then Manila shuffled closer, leaning in towards her. Curious, Raja turned to face her. Manila took her hand, gently pulling Raja in against her. Somewhat stiffly, Raja leaned in. But then Manila pressed herself even closer to Raja and kissed her, hands feeling their way up Raja's neck to tangle in her hair.

Raja broke the kiss, "Wait, what-"

"Can't we just-" said Manila, and kissed her again, one hand snaking its way around her waist. Confused, Raja acquiesced for a minute, allowing Manila to guide her down onto her back, continuing to kiss her. Raja hesitated, almost folding to the soft insistence of Manila's tongue and the warm glow of arousal. But the emotion of the evening came rushing back, the anxiety, the argument and the distinct lack of any solution to either of their problems.

"Wait, Manila, stop-" Raja turned her head away.

"Raja, come on," Manila whined, trying to kiss her again.

"No, we can't do this, we need to figure things out," said Raja, twisting away and gently pushing Manila off her.

"Fine."

They sat in silence once again. Manila had her arms crossed and a frown on her face. Raja was struck by the absurdity of her behaviour.

"Okay," muttered Manila, "Okay."

"What's up?"

"I need you to tell me," Manila took a deep breath, "Exactly what you said to Acid."

"This again? Why do you need to know?" Raja answered, eyebrows snapping together. 

"Because."

"Because? Okay sure," Raja muttered, "I just told her not to bother you anymore."

"That's it?"

"Or she'd have me to deal with."

"What? Why?"

The bad feeling was rising again in Raja's stomach. Trying to stay calm, she replied, "She can't go around hitting you in the face with blunt objects, and having… angry conversations at the ends of hallways and, and harassing you like this. It's messed up, we all know it, so yes, I said something to her."

Manila was staring at her, "You shouldn't have done that. It's none of your business."

"How did you even find out?" snapped Raja, "Are you two texting or something?"

"No, we just-" Manila paused, upset.

"What the fuck Manila? How- how is this even happening?" Exasperated, Raja took a breath, now really fighting with herself not to get upset, "I think this is a really fucked up situation between you and Acid, she's just cruel towards you, especially given how she attacked you-"

"It wasn't an attack."

"Yes it was! It's not a goddamn sports injury!" barked Raja, "It's assault and you know it. We've already had this entire fucking conversation and you aren't giving me an inch to explain myself! We're going in circles! God!"

Manila's shoulders were hunched, defensive, and she glared at Raja from the opposite end of the couch. Her eyes were cold.

"You don't get to tell me what's going on in my life."

"Then fucking explain it to me! Why are you defending her?"

"I- It's," Manila stuttered, "Yeah we used to be together okay? And it ended badly, but it was my fault! This, what she's doing, it's all because of me and what I did to her! It's my baggage and my mess, and I guess I'm sorry about that or whatever, but you need to stay out of it. I'm handling it."

Raja scoffed, "You're handling it? Whatever you did to her doesn't deserve a broken nose and a concussion."

Manila looked pained, "It's complicated."

"No it's not."

"Yes it is."

They both glowered at one another. Raja stewed in her anger, and from the corner of her eye she watched Manila's shoulders become more and more tense, eyes flying back and forth as though following some kind of internal argument. She had dark circles under her eyes, Raja noticed suddenly, perhaps she hadn't been getting enough sleep.

Manila broke the silence, "I think we should take a break."

"What?" snapped Raja, shocked, "You want to break up?"

"I said a break-"

"You're breaking up with me because of this-" Raja gestured at nothing, hurt and angry, "Because of this bullshit with your fucking ex?"

"It's not bull-"

"Are you fucking kidding me?"

"Stop interrupting me! It's not bullshit," Manila's eyes flashed and she got up off the couch, standing over Raja, "You don't understand! As if you even give a shit about me, all you care about is being right! Keep your nose out of my past and my ex and my fucking business! Just get your shit and leave!"

"Fine!" snarled Raja, standing up as well and looking down at Manila, "You're so blinded by- by whatever that you refuse to see how fucked up this situation is. You won't even admit it to yourself! Whatever, I don't need this. I don't need someone like this." Anger boiling in her veins, Raja shot Manila a glare and spun on her heel, seething. She marched into Manila's bedroom and hauled out he clothes she'd left there. She did the same thing in the kitchen and the bathroom, haphazardly shoving her things into a spare grocery bag. There wasn't much, but it was still a mark of the time she'd spent practically living at Manila's. The argument was turning itself over in her head and the anger and frustration weren't dissipating. 

Raja arrived back at the living room, and stood for a moment. She stared at Manila, who hadn't moved from her spot standing on front of the couch. Manila stared back. Raja adjusted the strap of her purse.

"I can't believe you lied to me about Acid the entire time."

"Raja-" Manila's voice broke.

"You want to deal with her without me? Fine, good luck," Raja managed, voice on the verge of breaking as well. But she held on, grounded in her rage. Raja turned away from Manila and left, slamming the door behind her.

-

Raja was in her apartment, pacing. The argument and break-up with Manila had left her angry and unsatisfied, and somewhere in the back of her brain, deeply hurt. She refused to acknowledge the hurt, dwelling in her anger and frustration. Raja looked at her phone, debated calling Raven. But she didn't want Raven's comfort or logic. Or the strong likelihood that Raven would tell her exactly what she thought about Raja's behaviour. 

Something in her clicked, and she moved towards the fridge, a bottle of wine calling out to her. Pouring herself a glass of red, Raja looked at her phone again. No messages from Manila. Fine, whatever. Raja didn't need her anyway. She took a big gulp of the wine. And another. An idea occurred to her.

"Hello?"

"Hey lady," Raja purred into the phone, happy that Aquaria had picked up on the second ring, "You busy tonight?"

"No, not really," replied Aquaria, a smile in her voice, "I had tentative plans with Naomi but they fell through."

"Well," said Raja, "How would you feel about coming over to my place and having some wine? It's been so long since we've gotten together. I'd just love to catch up." They dynamic between her and Aquaria had always been flirtatious, cooling off and heating up at different times but right now Raja was heating it up as much as she could.

"Mmm," murmured Aquaria, "That sounds like fun. Should I bring anything?"

"Surprise me."

"Ooh, is that a challenge?"

"It might be."

"Then I'll see what I can arrange…" with a giggle, Aquaria said goodbye and hung up. Raja smiled to herself, and drank more of her wine. She felt satisfied that Aquaria had agreed to come over. Aquaria was young, hot and available, following her own desires for pleasure and entertainment. Usually Raja worried about keeping up with her as the beautiful woman was out doing something seemingly every night of the week.

Raja washed her face, applied some dark eye makeup and put on an outfit that was comfortable but definitely sexy. Heady from the wine and full of complex emotions regarding Manila, she didn't know where exactly the night would lead. But she had a pretty good idea. 

Suddenly aware that this was the kind of thing her old therapist would have labelled 'self-destructive behaviour' Raja shook her head violently. No. This was what she wanted: to have a good time, and get over what she was feeling for Manila as quickly as humanly possible. Wine and sex would help with that. It wasn't a big deal.

Pouring herself a second glass, Raja contemplated whether Manila was having someone over now, at the same time as she was. Not that it mattered, Raja thought viciously, and whoever it was they certainly weren't as much fun as Aquaria. Darkly, part of her mind wondered if Manila had called Acid. Fuck. Draining her glass, Raja took a long pull of wine straight from the bottle and put on some music.

Luckily, Aquaria lived close by and was over soon, with more wine under her arm. She was wearing a tiny little crop top and tight black leather pants. Raja's eyes lingered. 

"It's so good to see you!"

"Yeah, you look really good," grinned Aquaria, leaning in for a hug, hands caressing Raja's waist. They made their way into the living room, chatting about their past few weeks. Raja poured them both wine.

"Hey, are you still seeing that girl? The athletic one?" asked Aquaria, laughing.

"Not at the moment," Raja replied conspiratorially, heart in her stomach, "Between you and me, she still isn't over her ex."

"Mmmm, well that's good for me, I guess," said Aquaria, raising an eyebrow. She reached out to rub Raja's thigh, both sympathetic and flirtatious. Intrigued and aroused, Raja quashed down the rage and hurt that were still bubbling under the surface at the mention of Manila. She wanted to feel something else. Anything else. She eyed Aquaria, who looked back, eyes already dark with desire.

"It could get even better."

"Really?"

"Yeah, for sure." 

With that, Raja leaned in and closed the space between them.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> thanks for sticking with me on this wild ride! the story very much got away from me but i had fun writing it. there is a sequel in the works, but it'll probably be a couple of months. there will be a resolution to all this angst damn it!!! ... eventually. anyway you readers rock. thanks for sticking with it :)


End file.
